This one time at BAND Camp... 1 vs. 300

I Hate TOM....

2012-02-28T01:38:00.002-08:00

That's my TOM>>>>> although I don't much care for Tom Cruise either. I am achy, bloated, craving chocolate, my band is super tight, and my weigh is up... more than usual. Being a Women is a blessing, and a curse!

Linda asked me What I like about... ME!

2012-02-23T20:37:00.002-08:00

What i like about you.... Wait! ME!...

I have sexy bedroom eyes.... that sparkle when I laugh, which is often... Must be the Irish in me.
I am very witty.... funny, and love to laugh and make people laugh.
I am Smart, both street smart and book smart... I absorb like a sponge and love to learn new things...
I have a great rack... even when I was almost thin I had big ones, and after losing almost 130 pounds, They haven't suffered much. Boobs are awesome!
My smile lights up my face and most rooms.... I don't care that I have deep laugh lines, because I cherish each smile and laugh that created them.

Greek BJs....

2012-02-23T00:19:00.000-08:00

Get your mind out of the gutter.... LOL It is good news though...

Stuck.... a Journey into Madness.

2012-02-15T22:22:00.000-08:00

Well, It's been 16 days since my fill... and I was enjoying my new restriction... until today. I enjoyed Valentine's Day... but it was stressful. My Stepfather-in-law is pure evil... I am pretty sure I mentioned it before but yesterday when we were running late already to head out for dinner and a movie... He had one of his fits and sent me into a sobfest, while driving to Jersey. He is mean with his words and threatening with his fists, and even though he's never hit me yet... I live in fear of him. Unfortunately, my husband isn't always home but yesterday they basically got into a fist fight when my George came to my aid during this "fight" with the Evil One. I hate to be in that position but I defend my MIL, who takes his verbal abuse daily... and as most of you who know me are aware... I can't keep my mouth shut, I don't ignore... things well. I stand up for myself and those I love... and I stand up for what I believe in. These are usually good qualities but sometimes... they aren't, at all. Because you can't use logic against those who are INSANE. They don't understand logic and it's their way... always. This is one of my run-on sentences posts... obviously.

I so don't want to end up on Springer but my FIL was born to be on that show...When we got away from him, and took my MIL with us, how romantic? We were meeting my Mom and her Fiance for dinner and a movie anyway. So, the more the merrier.... I couldn't calm down, I didn't want my mom to know how he treats us so I wanted to get myself together before we arrived at the restaurant... and I did. But my Band.... not so much, The stress made it like a vice. It was awful and I spent most of the time in the restroom, even though I only ordered soup.

Well, We went to the Advanced screening of Titanic 3D which is released in April for the hundredth anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic. It was wonderful, There was a string quartet playing, we got swag bags with t-shirts and other souvenirs, free popcorn and soda(Not for me thanx)... The movie was amazing as expected and it felt great to cry about someone else's life story... LOL. With the addition of 3D, it was like you were right there on the ship... WOW!

Now, here we are today, I still feel stressed and worn out... We were out shopping for used cars and when we got home I made dinner and it got more stuck then ever before... I made Beef with Broccoli in my Wok... It tasted good but I think Beef/steak is a problem for me now and I didn't even attempt any rice. After a few bites, I gave the rest to my husband and slowly gagged for about 2 hours afterwards... coughing and spitting... You know the routine. It was awful. Hours later, I had some Greek yogurt with fiber one cereal in it and it went down fine. I also drank a protein shake to get some extra protein... Well, tomorrow's another day... and BTW, we got a used car today so I am more mobile and able to start going to the gym more often or at least go... sometimes...LOL.

As for my fill, I have an appointment next Wednesday with the Bariatric Surgeon so I could get a small unfill if necessary... But it was probably just the Stress... Fingers Crossed.

BYOC.... Better late than pregnant

2012-02-11T08:52:00.000-08:00

It’s Friday and that means it’s time for BYOC! Bring Your Own Crazy! We answer 5 questions in an effort to get to know each other better and to give our blogging brains a break. Copy to your own blog if you wish and ENJOY!

1. Name a Valentine gift you would NOT want to receive.

Valentine's Day reminds us to show love, We shouldn't have to be reminded to show love... So it basically is a day for people dating to test the value of the relationship. Since I am a sucker for love, and I think It can't hurt to remind others who they love and why, It is harmless. As for me, Since me and my George never had kids we stayed in the lovey dovey stage... and we love to have excuses to show our love... We celebrate the day we met, the first time we ...(Which was a different day...LOL), the day we got married... So we are a little over the top.

2. What’s your vacation personality? Do you act/eat/talk/do things differently or completely opposite from when you are not on vacation?

I am the same on vacation, since I'm a lady o leisure regularly, but my eating habits are out of control.

3. Describe yourself in 5 POSITIVE words.

Witty

Charismatic

Sparkly

Proud

Loyal

4. Do you have any phobias or irrational fears or dislikes?

Not Really, I am afraid of losing my loved ones, but other than that, I am fearless.

5. Repeat question: Summarize your week in blog land and in real life.

I am eating well, but haven't gotten to the gym yet. I am liking my new fill but not sure I am at the sweet spot yet. It will be two weeks since my fill on Monday. It feels pretty good so far. Other than that, I have been going to alot of screenings and to see several movies. I am now sick and have to drag myself to Lancaster, PA(Amish Country) to see Air Supply tonight even though I am not feeling it. I am an Airhead by marriage, I have seen Air Supply like 15 times since I met my husband over 20 years ago, and he's seen them like 22 times... all together.

My Movie reviews for this week are....

The Vow~ It was a good story, and a true story... which makes it even better. It was sad and hard to watch at times, but worth seeing for any romance lover. Rachel McAdams was great, but It is weird that Channing Tatum has like 3 movies out at once though. If you don't go out alot to the movies, Wait for This means War... Much better.

One for the Money~This one disappoints big time, It is not funny and the action is weak. It seemed forced, the stars had no chemistry and the only redeeming moments were fueled by a chubby fiesty hooker played wonderfully by Sheri Shepherd.

Journey 2: The Mysterious Island~It was exciting, action-packed, funny, and of course there's the Rock. I loved the movie but the one flaw had to be the Rock's shirt was in every scene... Come on! Michael Caine was great, and so were the rest of the Cast... It was a great family movie.

Haywire~I hated this movie, it was slow boring, and made me wonder what could possibly have influenced them to make the movie at all. It was supposed to be an action flick, but without action or special effects... Terrible! So Far, this is the worse movie of the year... in my opinion.

The Descendants~I really wanted to love this movie, I mean, it's nominated for best picture and it's set in Hawaii, which is one of my favorite places in the world. It was slow, sad, and I struggled to care what happened by the end. There was little to no chemistry between the characters, and the story wasn't done justice. I definitely wished I had missed this one.

Big Miracle~ A Great story, I loved all the characters and it was fun journey. It is based on a true story... which is a plus. Drew Barrymore, John Krasinski, and the rest of the cast were wonderful. It was amazing to find yourself routing for the whales, and all the people who came to love them. Good Movie!

2012-02-06T11:49:00.000-08:00

Robyn has started a new weekly tradition of Make a List Monday. It will be a list of 10 things related to the category she selects.

The category for Make A List Monday is: Places you would like to visit in the world again or for the first time. It can be a Country, State, City, Park, place of interest, amusement park, or whatever you are interested in visiting.

Here is my list:

Egypt(A Nile Cruise and to see the Pyramids)
Germany(Where my Father was from)
Paris(And DisneyLand Paris)
Italy(All over)
Hawaii(I would love to see Maui and Oahu again, & The Kona side of the Big Island)
Australia
Japan
China
Greece
Machu Picchu

I would love to go anywhere at this moment!

Friend Hoarder?... Get rid of the dead weight, all of it!

2012-02-04T19:20:00.000-08:00

I am a Friend Hoarder... I keep friends long after their expiration date. Reasons Why in Bullet Form....

I am a non-working adult... It is difficult to meet new people when you aren't in someone's face each day in a work or school situation.
I feel sorry for people, when people are needy, lonely, pathetic or sad... I want to be there for them, even if they are Toxic to me.
I am an honest person... I don't lie, and don't assume people are lying or hiding things from me, but they do... all the time. They take advantage of your compassion and faith.
I am the Funny Fat Girl... no one can be funny without an audience, right? If you laugh at everything I say, than I am less likely to notice the knife in my back.
I am open-minded... but sometimes I think I need to draw the line somewhere.
I like being around people, I find them fascinating.
You live too far away, the best choices of friends are spread all over the country and not in the city of Brotherly Love.
I am a Social Butterfly, I like to eat with others, shop with others, even workout with others.... I am not a loner.
Who doesn't want to share their secrets with someone more shockable than your therapist?
I like to Scrapbook... which is a very social hobby, it's not all work and creativity... it's mostly chatting, gabbing, and laughing.
Support and Goodwill doesn't grow on trees... You need to search it out and cherish it. Blog, text, call, stop by, skype... Do what you need to to get it and keep it, and do what you need to to deserve it.
I will tell you the full story behind this blog... once I get my head all around it. I cherish you and look forward to more of you popping up around me. I need more local BOOBS... I love Beth and Barb, but they have their Beaus and their high powered careers... but I will see more of them... this year.

I love Movies.... and I realize I don't share enough about it.

2012-02-02T19:45:00.000-08:00

You all know I love to go to the movies and most of you probably have read about how I go to advance screenings and see most movies in advance.... Well, Here's my review of what I've seen lately...

The Woman in Black~ Typical spooky movie, great setting in the 1900's, i jumped out of my seats a few times, but not overly scary.... more on the creepy side. Daniel Radcliffe was very good in the role. It comes out this Friday and if you like that sort of thing it's worth seeing but it's pretty much been done before. Think Darkness Falls and a little bit of a Japanese horror edge to it like the Ring, or the Grudge.
Chronicle~ Thriller with a touch of horror, 3 teenage boys get powers of the mind (Telekinesis).... It was fun but not a must see. It has an amateur filming technique as used in Paranormal Activity and Blair Witch Project, which is a little over-used these days. The special effects were great though. I enjoyed the movie, but I am easy on those type films. I loved all the Final Destination movies. Chronicle is also released this Friday, 02/03/2012
This Means War~This fun Romantic Comedy is more than meets the eye. I actually saw it twice, I liked it so much last week that we took my MIL to see it again this week. And she loved it too. It has something for everyone, Action for the Men, Romance for the Girls, and Comedy for those who like to laugh.... and if you don't like to laugh, I don't want to know you... LOL. You are too serious! Loosen up. I loved Reese Whiterspoon, Chris Pine and Tom Hardy are wonderful as her competing Beaus, and Chelsey Handler is amazing as her BFF. You really have to check it out, but it doesn't come out Til Valentine's Day so you have to wait about 2 weeks, but it's worth the wait. I'm gonna give it 2 Boobs Up!
The Grey~A great Survival Dramatic Action Movie. I am a little Prejudice since I am a huge Liam Neeson Fan but it sure takes you on an emotional journey. The setting is Arctic Brutal Beauty... The Cast is great, especially Liam Neeson, and the ending keeps you guessing. It is a great film, but take some tissues, It is an emotional journey.... like I said. I saw this movie a month ago in a screening, and you could see it right now, If you're interested. It is not very uplifting though... but worth the trauma.
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close~A wonderful story about a child coming to terms with his Grief after losing his father in the World Trade Center on 9/11. It is much more uplifting that expected but bring tissues, I cried about a million times... (BTW: I love to cry at movies, I feel like it is a release and an escape... I even cried during the Nutty Professor when Dave Chapelle was cutting his up for his size/Fat...i guess It hit too close to home for me). The boy in the movie Thomas Horn was absolutely amazing. He was worth seeing the movie for... just him alone. It is a tearjerker, consider yourself warned. I saw this movie weeks ago as well, but it is out in theaters now, and nominated for several Academy Awards.

I feel like I am overwhelming you with all these movies for one blog post... In band news, Monday's fill feels pretty good to me, I am not sure I know the full results yet... but I'll let you know as time goes by how I feel... Keep your fingers crossed that I hit my sweet spot this time...

Just a Shot in the Dark, and the days that follow.

2012-02-01T20:03:00.000-08:00

I got a Fill on Monday.... It was my first fill in over a year.

I guess I didn't really want one before now because even though I wasn't tight, I had restriction and a very valid fear of getting too tight, since I read all about that stuff on your blogs... and my band is so fickle, one day I am tight and the next day loose.
Eventually, I just got too loose and I was hungry all the time so I got a fill. Well, It was the smallest fill I ever got (1cc) and also the most painful. I don't understand why?
It was under Fluoro, and it's the first time I had a fill that way.... but still painful and weird.
Since this Fluoro Fill, I have felt nausea since that day and have liquid diarrhea(Sorry: TMI) as a parting gift.
Have any of you had these post-fill symptoms?
Should I be worried? I have been drinking as much water as I can to keep from being dehydrated....
I was on liquids only for a day.... and I should be on pureed or mushy proteins since yesterday until friday. I have been ok, with eating greek yogurt with fiber one cereal, chicken salad on on a 1/2 piece of rye bread, so I think I am alright with eating things... so far.
I am still chasing that elusive sweet spot.... even after 22 months. Keep your fingers crossed that I poop solid soon and hit the sweet spot now?

Winter?... Wanderland.

2012-01-24T15:09:00.000-08:00

I am SICK.... And I guess I knew it would be coming since I have been going outside not dressed warmly enough but this past weekend I bundled up... My New parka that was an amazing gift from the sisterhood, 2 pairs of gloves(Including my fancy new touchscreen capable isotoner gloves from my thoughtful hubby), a scarf, and my Croc snow boots(which keep my feet warm and dry)....but while videotaping my nephews sledding and playing in the snow, my hands started getting more and more cold. I didn't want to miss anything but then my feet started to get colder and colder.

Fast Forward 2 days and I am at my doctor's office begging for drugs... Just a side note, My doctor is like 100 years old. So everything that goes wrong with me is because I am FAT. Even a head cold, i guess. I really need to get a new doctor.... He's is a smart man, graduated from University of Penn in 1949, 20 years before I was even born. But UoP is a great university, incredibly hard to get into especially, back then. But I need someone who is proactive... with my health. I need to feel valued for who I am as a person, not what size I am. I told him I am starting with Weight Watchers this week.... I felt bad about being back in a place where I am explaining my weight loss efforts again. My old doctor knew me when I was almost 500 pounds, he knew how bad my health was and he knew how far I came, and this new one just sees me as a Huge Fat girl... when I am a LESS Fat girl. I know it shouldn't bother me, I should be used to being judged by my weight... but it still sucks!

Movies and Stuff....

2012-01-19T01:26:00.000-08:00

I know it's been too long since I last blogged... but I didn't have much to say. Well, I made my appt for my first fill of the new year for the end of the month so maybe i can get a handle on this constant hunger. i am starting Weight watchers then as well.... so we'll see how they work together. i am pretty sure I told you all that we love to go to the movies alot. We see alot of screenings which are free previews of movies in advance of when the movie is released. Alot of Critics go to the screenings... but other than that... They're fun! So, George and i asked my brother to go with us last night to see "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close" with Sandra Bullock and Tom Hanks.... It was a tear-jerker for sure but a great story, and the boy who was in the lead role was amazing. Tonight, we went on a double date with my mom and her fiancee to dinner and to see The Grey which is Liam Neeson's new movie(I love Liam Neeson, huge fan...). So that was fun, When my Dad was alive, We used to double date with him and my mom... but this is the first time with my mom and her new beau. BTW, The new Beau.... who's not that new, actually... Took my Mom to both of her Proms like 40 some years ago....So, they reconnected, about 4 years ago a couple years after my Dad passed away. So... now they're engaged to be married. My brother is not thrilled, he's actually against them getting married but hopefully he'll come around... someday. My Dad would definitely want her to have a companion and be happy. Well, I've babbled enough.... for today.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia... Yeah Right!

2012-01-08T18:37:00.000-08:00

I start off with a photo of my Sweet Nephews... who are Totally worth the 1000 mile move home and leaving the wonderful O-Town weather and Disney Magic behind... Even though monetarily, we were better off there... My Happiest Place on Earth is HERE.
It's getting crisp and cold... but I'm lovin' the boots and hats (I love my hats)... You would think that since I grew up here and lived here the first 30+ years of my life, That the cold wouldn't bother me but I was always cold before and Florida thinned my blood big time over that decade of Disney.

Money can't buy Happiness but it can buy everything else, and Lack of Money can buy Unhappiness, for sure.
Have you every wanted to get off the phone so much and the person isn't taking the hint? So you go on and on telling long-winded stories about yourself, your adorable nephews or your dog... to bore them into compliance? No?.... Me neither.
Is it just me or does celery taste like crispy water?
I realize that I did better on this diet when I was eating the same things over and over again.... Variety may be the spice of life but it is the Death of Diet.
I am reading all of Jennifer Weiner's books thanx to my friend Beth(BTW... If you haven't checked out her blog yet, Check it out!)... She reminded me of the desire to read them that laziness encouraged me to forgot. So far, I am loving them...
My brother is doing well on Weight Watchers... so I am thinking of joining him. When I have the discipline and structure... I do better overall. I realize that i wasn't tired of dieting, I was tired of gaining the weight back after giving up or burning out. Which is less of a risk now... So Weight Watchers, Here I Come!

Detox... Day one.

2012-01-01T13:43:00.000-08:00

DETOX... It was almost my word for 2012. I need to get rid of this carb monkey... They taste so good.... and they are so hard to resist. Sounds like I am a junkie, right? Well, I am.... and I will tell you How I know!

I desire sugar.... I don't care if I get my protein in or worry about my fiber... I want Sugar.
Sugar is my drug, it gives me a natural high that makes me feel great for a very short time and a crashing low afterwards...
I can't eat it in moderation... I always think that i can this time, but I am wrong.
I would prefer it over everything else.... Cake, Cookies, Chocolate... In all forms, it's delicious.
I sneak eat it... If I feel I have to hide eating it, or how much I eat of it. I shouldn't be eating it at all.
It keeps me from my goals... i can't lose weight with Sugar in my diet... I am not talking about Milk sugar, or natural sugar from fruits.... I am talking straight up Simple Sugars.
It makes me crave more... and more... and more.
It is not my friend and is not supportive of my success.
I want this monkey off my back.... long term.

DETOX.... That's where I am, I am in my own home but I am on all liquids... and it feels like withdrawal. The Sugar overload of the holidays has made me want all carbs... chips, pretzels, chocolate, cookies, cake, etc... I need to knock this monkey off my back by getting back to basics.

PLATEAU... This is what brought this on, i stopped losing weight even while doing everything right, so each week with no results, made me do less and less right until.... I was doing everything wrong. Now don't get me wrong, i can't do as much wrong as I could pre-band but i sure tried. Every diet I was ever on came to this... and I gained the weight back. My band has helped me maintain ever in this distress. I fell off the wagon and i needed to get back on. I was saved by my band, I may of gained a few pounds back(I don't know since my scale isn't working)
but my clothes still fit and I don't feel heavier. I am hoping I caught this in time.

RESULTS... If I stop seeing results, I will do more right... not more wrong. The pain in my knees, back, feet, and hips is back... My body is now used to this weight. I need to get it feeling great again. Knock off a few pounds so I can hit the gym harder and get more results. This is HARD WORK... Don't let anyone tell you different!

ReNew... My Word for 2012

2011-12-31T16:35:00.000-08:00

RENEW...

RENEW... My WillPower~I have not struggled with willpower in a long while, Why? You ask... because i haven't needed to struggle since giving in has become the new Thing... for me. I have reverted back to my start the diet monday, and feast until then mentality. We all know how well that process works.
RENEW... My Strength~This is part of the first section since Strength is what it takes to win the war. Even though, I've lost a few battles, I will win the War.
RENEW... My World~It's boring me these days, I need to get out more and enjoy this city that I love so much, Enjoy my Man that I love so much, and enjoy my family that I love so much.
RENEW... My Exercise plan~I have moved my Wii to a more convienent TV and I will Just Dance every day, Start back at the Gym 3 times a week and work up to 4 or 5 times a week, and walk my Dog twice a day or more.
RENEW.... My Meal plan~I have to CUT out the Fat by cutting out the Carbs, again. I have come to the acception that If i cannot eat just one of something, I cannot eat even one... I don't know if that's just for now or for a lifetime.
RENEW... My Life~Similar to my World... My Life is not as full as I would like it to be... I wanted to move back here to be closer to my family but I didn't want to give up so much for so long. We need to get back our travels and reconnect with old friends to RENEW old friendships. I miss my O-Town friends but Here is where my life began, here is where I met the love of my life, here is where my family flourishes, and here is where my heart lives. Here is Home..
RENEW... My Routine~I need to shake off the lazy and get back to crazy. I need to multi-task and get it done.
RENEW... My Reward system~I have never rewarded myself for my weight loss, and most of it has to do with lack of funds, but I need to work towards something... or I'm not going to bring my best self to the game. And as you know...You have to Bring it, to Be it!
RENEW.... My Band~This is more complex. Tomorrow, I start the New Year with liquids...
I am flushing out my system and getting the CARB Monkey off my back. The 5 day pouch test begins tomorrow.... After, 1 month... If I am continuing to not see the results, I desire... I will RENEW my band to a Gastric Sleeve. I am proud of what my band has taught me and what it has done for my health... but my journey is only like 1/2 over, I may need more help to get to where I need to be.

RENEW.... I have been successful at most diets for at least 3 months, if I can continue that rate of success without gaining back on my breaks... I will get there, even in utter Failure. But who wants to wait a decade to get the weight off.... LOL. Let's get there together in 2012. We will continue to support each other, pick each other up when we each fall, and SUCCESS will be ours. It takes Teamwork to make the Dream Work! Happy New Year to all my BOOBS! I love you all! XOXO *M*

Christmas comes in like a Bullet!

2011-12-23T15:53:00.000-08:00

Christmas thoughts... Bullet-Style!

I am not afraid of making bad food choices on Christmas Eve and Day... mainly because I haven't been making the best choices on the rest of the days. But my choices have been better this week than last... so we'll call that progress.
I love all the Christmas Shows and music... It doesn't annoy me like many other Scrooge type folks. I love to sing and Christmas welcomes it more. People don't stare at you as much when you sing along to Christmas Carols as they do when you ask them to look at you body because you work out... like LMFAO.... LOL
I love seeing people wear their faith on their sleeves this time of year... You believe in God and you are proud of it... Yay! It is wonderful to see people full of the light of the Lord at a time when you are much more likely to find 3 Hos, then 3 wise men. I don't believe in using the term X-Mas even though Jesus wasn't born this time of year since this is when Christians celebrate his birth.
I love hats as you know and i have many Christmas Hats for that reason...My favorite is one of my favorite colors... Sequins.
I can't wait to spend my first Christmas in over a decade with my family... I love them all so much.
Next year, There will be 2 more little girls in this family, My Niece Niki is having a Girl and so is my Sister-in-Law Tobi. My nephews are having a baby sister... Yay! I am going to be a Great-Aunt when my sister's daughter gives birth in May... Making me a Surrogate Grandma... Since my sister passed away several years ago and we helped raise her teenage daughter since then. Niki is 22 now... but she is in an abusive/unhealthy relationship so please pray for her...
Money is really tight this year so this will be the first year in over 20 years that we don't send out Christmas cards.... It's hard to swallow but at least we are surrounded with love.
Tomorrow... Christmas Eve, We spend at my Aunt's house with all my family and Sunday... Christmas Day, we spend the afternoon at my Uncle's house and the evening at my other Aunt's house. It is going be action packed. My father's sister keeps alot of the German traditions(I am like 65% German decent).
Have a Wonderful Christmas Weekend to you all! XOXO

The road to recovery has alot of scenic routes and forks...

2011-12-17T01:16:00.000-08:00

When they say.... You must be taking the Scenic Route, I usually am. I am a Traveler not a Tourist. I enjoy the journey as much as the destination. Well, I'm getting tired of the Scenic Route to LessVille. LessVille is where I have been heading for over 18 months... Less Weight, Less Health issues, Less Back and Knee Pain, Less restrictions.... The problem is that the fastest way to get there is LESS too... Less Carbs and Less Sugar, and Less Loafing in front of the TV. The trip takes me through MoreTown, More exercise, more calorie counting, more dieting... if i take the route through MoreTown... it also means MORE SUCCESS. Here are the issues...

I need to give up the drugs... SUGAR is my drug of choice. I need to go cold turkey since Moderation is like the impossible dream. I can't keep being a dreamer, Reality is not just for TV.
I have to deal with the pain and work out harder and more.... No Pain, Means U Gain. And I want to Lose, not gain.
So far, I have been maintaining and even losing a little... so I don't get the fire under me that I need, but I need to work harder. Much Harder!
These Depression filled months have been killing my Food Choices, and I have to shake it off. But my husband being out of work and my first Christmas back home being financially unsparkly... is difficult. I know I will be surrounded with my family and that's all that should matter, the few gifts i got here and there will have to do.
I am reading Kendra Wilkinson's(Playboy Playmate who was one of the Girls Next Door) second book and surprisingly the skinny sexy bitch got me back in the Here and Now. She gained 57 pounds in her pregnancy and struggled to get it off. She said that it made her more aware of the people who struggle with their weight and how tough it is for them. If she who has tons of money, personal trainers, a Professional Athlete husband, could hire a chef, and makes her money based on her desirability and her looks struggled to lose the weight... What hope is there for the rest of us? Well, She has a tyroid problem... but have a Procrastination problem, Get it Together Maria! You will never be in Playboy but you can get from Chub to Chunk to just plain Thick.
2012 is gonna kick 2011's ASS.... Big time!
I haven't been blogging enough... at all.
I am going to try harder, and be better... overall.
XOXO.... I love you guys! Thanx for your incredible support.

Worldwind Week....

2011-12-09T01:19:00.000-08:00

Well.... Bullets, anyone?

We have been traveling alot these last 2 months... Even Too Much, I think.
I enjoyed Disneyland, alot.... but it is always busy, too busy and it's been really cold.
We are now staying in Pasadena, which is a first for us and it is a cute little area which fairly good access to the Studios we've been hitting these last few days.
We watched Rules of Engagement, & Mike & Molly be filmed and met the casts... it was nice and we enjoyed it. Tomorrow we are seeing Hot in Cleveland before catching the Red eye back to Philly.
I rode alot of Roller Coasters and Thrill rides both at Disneyland and Universal Studios Hollywood...
SoCal Folk must love Churros....
Young Asian Girls seem to warm up their Daisy Duke shorts with black tights and winter boots... Interesting look?
Traffic sucks in LA!
We saw the Flyers beat the Ducks last Friday, that's Hockey for you Sports Challenged Girls... It was a great game!
We went to a Dinner Show called Battle of the Dance which was Hella Fun! Food was banquet style but edible and the dancers were great.
I miss my Nephews so much I could Die.... Drama Queen, much?
I look forward to Christmas so much.... It's great to be home.

BOOBS' Blessings brought home from Chicago

2011-11-28T19:15:00.000-08:00

Well, I met alot of BOOBS in Chicago and I learned a little from all of them.... but this is one thing I brought home to try out. Influenced by a Eating too Fast, Getting Stuck, and our Little Becky from Prudence Rising... She pulled out a pair of Chopsticks at a Tattoo Parlor in Wicker Park and started eating Gourmet Popcorn with them... I immediately asked how that came to be since i am so forward and pushy and my quest for knowledge is never-ending. She says that it forces her to slow down. I figured... Why not give it a try for myself. Check out her blog if you haven't yet... She's an amazing inspiration...I got these Chopsticks in DisneyWorld at the Animal Kingdom in Asia. They are held together with a cute little Fortune Cookie and have the saying "Eat to Live, Don't Live to Eat" written on them. Perfect for a food addict like me, right?

I should tell you, most of the time... I may not live to eat but I don't only eat to live either. It's a work in progress. In Other News, We are headed to LA on Thursday morning to spend a week or so doing theme parks and TV Shows. I look forward to it... Any SoCal BOOBS interested in a get-together?

Coming Home.... Just in time for a Big Fat Turkey and Hopefully some PIE!

2011-11-22T05:53:00.000-08:00

Today, We are heading home.... Yay! I love Disney but I miss my Nephews so much.

Have you ever had your maxipad get all twisted and give you an involuntary Brazilian wax? No.... Me Neither.
I went to the Disney Theme Parks only 2 days since I got here 3 weeks ago.... LOL
I got to see alot of my friends including Amy(Babbles of a Bandster)
I went to Amy's house and met her beautiful kids and then we went to support group together. I really missed her.
Some NSVs.... I fit on every roller coaster that I tried to go on, Everyone has told me that I look thinner even though I really haven't lost much weight in the last 7 months(I may be redistributing the weight or they're just trying to be nice...LOL), & I walked all over the parks without pain and suffering or hyperventilation.
In other news, my eating hasn't been great... but I will get back into my routine when I get home.
I still love my husband, even after a stressful work trip like this full of seedy motels, crap eating, hardly seeing each other, clearing out our old house, goodwilling, & 4 days of sleeping on a friend's couch and loveseat like we're teenagers.
I can't wait to sleep in my own bed tonight... and cuddle my husband and our furry son(I really missed Mr. Q)...
I look forward to thanksgiving but it's mostly about seeing my family and spending time with them all... and less about the PIE.
I am sorry I haven't written that much lately... but I will have some more stories to tell so stayed tuned.

Roller Coasters.... A Fat Girl's Enemy?

2011-11-16T23:21:00.000-08:00

I have always loved Roller Coasters... For as long as I can remember. I convinced myself when I became too large to ride them, that I had outgrown them... but that was a lie. Today I went on 2 roller coasters at Disney and not only fit but was comfortable. I remember going on Expedition Everest for my first time with a bunch of BOOBS. I was afraid that I would be turned away or not fit... but I rode it like the wind... Twice in a row. I rode Rockin' Roller Coaster twice today and Everest once...I can't wait to go to Disneyland next month and see where the thrill takes me!

The Sunshine State,,, Bullets over Disney

2011-11-07T01:54:00.000-08:00

I really did miss the weather, It's not hot here but it's comfortable. I like throwing on a lite jacket once in a while, but not having to bundle up.
I hate the tourists, they're annoying... They are in their own world, don't know where they're going and make driving here incredibly dangerous. I know HATE is a strong word... but for dramatic effect, It works. Pull over to the side, and figure it out people... Who reads a map while driving? Being a tourist is the most self-centered thing you can be, it's similar to being a Kardasian... I love to travel, but I am a traveler. I enjoy the journey as much as the designation, and try to step lightly on the locals' lives.... maybe even enhance them.
The WiFi at this motel is spotty at best, I am blogging ay 5am to be able to use it freely... I need to use the internet during the day when folks are at the theme parks, but I have been running around too much.
My George has been enjoying being back at Disney for a couple weeks, he missed it...He loves the people he works with and the extra money has been a godsend. He has been working alot though and I hardly ever see him... but in a few weeks we'll be back home and enjoying our first thanksgiving with our families.
I had lunch yesterday with one of my lapband support group friends, she works with George and we used to go to group every month together. She is not a blogger but is doing well, She just had to have her Gallbladder removed, which I hear is common.
I have gotten to spend time with alot of my O-Town friends which is great, but I also have been eating out alot... since I am limited to what I can do at the Motel. I stocked the Mini-fridge with greek yogurt, protein shakes, and bottled water... and I am trying to make good choices when I am out, it's hard to keep track of my calories though...
I brought my Wii and have been keeping up with my Just Dancing each day. I played with friends for the first time the other day... It sure was fun, Fitness and fun usually don't go together for me... Maybe someday.
I miss my Nephews, this weekend that just past was my first weekend I missed seeing them in 6 months. They are the Sunshine in my other State.
Overall, Life is Good... I am going through some things we are putting in storage down here until we drive down next(We flew this time), goodwilling, and tossing... Our house is a huge mess but it's getting there. Unloading that burden will be a huge blessing.

PS... Did I mention that the Tourists suck?
PPS... I miss you too Beth, I am singing the KISS song in my head to you? Just a few more hours and I'll be back home to you... Did this just get creepy? LOL... Anyone, if anyone hasn't checked out Beth's blog... Head over there. She's amazing, and she's friends with me... So that means she's patient, understanding, not easily embarrassed and has lots of bail money.

Headed to find the Sun....

2011-11-01T01:06:00.001-07:00

A Week... It's been a whole week since I posted. I have been busy though, not that I am excusing myself. My George and I are leaving in an hour for our first WORK trip to Disney, well... He's working and I am playing. I look forward to seeing my friends and all, but I especially look forward to warming up. This past weekend's snow put a damper on Halloween but I really enjoyed going trick or treating with my nephews. I couldn't have done that 2 years ago, or even last year. I walked and walked and walked... It was wonderful! I will write again soon, and when I do... my fingers won't be too cold to type.

Life gets in the Way....

2011-10-24T13:17:00.000-07:00

I know everyone struggles from time to time, but when they tell you you have too much on your plate to a Food Addict, it has a double meaning. I guess maybe I have too much time on my hands, usually.... at least. I spend most weekends with my Sister-in-Law and my adorable nephews which keeps me very busy but other than that. I have to get off my ass and exercise again. I walk a good amount but not enough. And as it gets colder, I am "Choosing" to walk less and less, so starting next week, I'll be back in Orlando for most of November... which means even less walking. I am hoping to be able to go back to my old gym though... fingers crossed. If not, I was planning on joining Planet Fitness as a secondary... so I guess I would be able to use the ones there, is that how it works?

I look forward to seeing my O-Town and Disney Friends...
I can't wait to spend some time at DisneyWorld, I do miss it alot.
I'm excited to go to my old support group in November, It was always a great group.
I am dreading going through our house down there and preparing it for short sale, We are definitely not moving back down there so, we'll cut our losses... and continue with the next phase of our life.
I am making a scrapbook for my Little Sis(SIL) for her birthday next month at my favorite scrapbook shop with my favorite scrapbook friends in my downtime in O-Town.
This is a new kind of travel for us, sort of a closure work/play trip, work for my George and Play for me...LOL, I will find out how easy or difficult keeping his seasonal status at Disney will be though... Who knows, this might be part of our travel itinerary from now on.
As for Weight Loss, It's up and down ... still kinda maintaining. I have been thinking about having revision surgery like my new surgeon suggests but I want to know I am doing everything right and still not losing weight before jumping to something that serious. Truth is... I was doing everything right and the longer I went with no results, the more I started making more bad choices and not exercising enough or at all. So, I am pretty sure the next few months will be tough, between traveling for over a month of it and the holidays... but I am going to try to limit bad choices to get-togethers or parties and make good choices the rest of the time. A little exercise couldn't hurt either...

*My Friend Beth... The Blogging Bandster.**

2011-10-16T11:30:00.001-07:00

Hello Followers and Leaders,
We are both of those, aren't we? We follow and lead each other through this incredibly difficult and rewarding journey of ours. I think I mentioned in a previous blog that a friend of mine from High School was being banded, since I moved back home 6 months ago, we've been going to the support groups together enjoying a renewed and much deeper friendship than we ever did in HS. Her name is Beth and she had her lapband installed a little over a week ago. She has been doing well so far and is excited about her fitter future(Is fitter a word? It should be.)

So, Now comes your part in this saga... She is a new blogger and a new bandster. Lets support her by clicking this link and checking out her blog. I know how much your support has meant to me, Like Kevin Spacey says.... Pay it Forward. Beth is funny, or at least she laughs at all my witty banter which means she has the best sense of humor... She is a huge Eagles fan, even though they are in last place... Not a Frontrunner. She is hard-working, which is a great match for my Hardly working. She is a great addition to the sisterhood, since she's already offered me everything from Protein shakes to Iced Tea sticks... Who doesn't love a giver? She also puts up with my sarcastic, overly honest, pushy, overbearing, personality... which is an acquired taste, as many of you are aware. She isn't embarrassed being seen with me even though I talk like a truck driver with Tourettes, flirt shamelessly, and overshare always. I love Beth! and you will too. Check out Beth's BellyBusting Blog... at http://bethsbellybustingblog.blogspot.com/ You won't regret it! Tell her the Biggest Bitch in the blogosphere sent you... she'll know who you mean... LOL

Sweet Sixteen-Always Been Kissed!

2011-10-14T15:54:00.000-07:00

We Love Each Other.... LOL
George and I on our Wedding Day October 14, 1995...
Awwww, I miss my SodaPop... Just being goofy!
Christmas Time 1992
Christmas Time at DisneyWorld 1995
Pecking through our wedding Cake... October 14, 1995
Just dating 1991...
At a friend's wedding 1992

On our Honeymoon October 1995

At the Movies... Our favorite place. Around 2004
DisneyLand Christmastime 2005/ Disneyland's 50th Anniversary... and yes we are wearing matching Dork Shirts.
Climbing Dunn's River Falls-Jamaica February 2011
On our Royal Caribbean Cruise...February 2011
At Chichen Itza, Mexico-November 2010... (Below)At a Phillies Game, August 2011
Petting a Dolphin in Cozumel... October 2010

George and I met at a Mall at Christmastime in 1991.
We love to travel and see the world.
We love to go to the movies at least once a week.
We love kids, but are Blissfully Child-Free just like Lynda...Lol.
We love our Niece and Nephews, and moved back home to Philly to be near them.
We love Disney... alot.
He has been very supportive of my weight loss journey but can be a bit of an enabler...
He has such beautiful eyes that I can't wait to spend the rest of my life staring into them.
I am the messy creative type... and he is the organized thoughtful type.
He cooks, clean, does laundry... and I never have to ask him to do anything, he just does it.
I adore his Mom, she is like my second mother.
I dislike his sister, she's like the anti-christ without the charisma.
He love my family, but he's not my Mom's biggest fan.
I am n0t my mom's biggest fan either.
I am George's Biggest Fan though...
I am my Beloved, and my Beloved is mine.

Do you like Key Lime Pie?

2011-10-12T15:20:00.002-07:00

KEY LIME

I am not a huge Key Lime Pie fan but Dannon Oikos Key Lime is YUMMY... I always put some Original Fiber One cereal in my Greek Yogurt in the morning and in the key lime, It tastes like Delicious Crust, nutty and crispy. Really Good! Give it a try, a nutritious protein packed Dessert.

Recuperation... My Kind of Town?

2011-10-05T12:30:00.000-07:00

I love Chicago, I have been t0 alot of cities...but Chicago is gorgeous. The Skyline is untouchable, it's absolutely stunning. Of course, that Cow starting the great fire was a tragedy but WOW! The Rebuilding, amazing! and now for the bullet points...

I am worn out, tired, and sick... It seems 4 days of less than: Sleep, nutrition, and relaxation? may not be my friend. I did walk a ton though.
I spent time with my wonderful old friends, and met some incredible new ones.
Barb's boobs were pimped out for rewards of Chocolate; as well as: attention, gawks, drool, free drinks, and a Drag Queen's Piggy Bank.
There was a whole lotta tattooing going on in Wicker Park, I supervised while eating Chocolate Custard with a Peanut butter swirl.
I just ate a delicious crab cake from the Seafood place down the street from where I live.
I got some amazing clothes from the sisterhood, in fact our hotel room looked like an episode of hoarders, it was crazy how generous and thoughtful you all are.
Most of us spent some of the weekend between Marilyn Monroe's legs...and the rest thinking about Motorboating Barb's Boobs.
I feel renewed about my diet and exercise, even though I just ate a crab cake...
I couldn't believe how skinny everyone was... you are all such a success story.
Is is just me or is "Athletic" a nicer way of saying... No Fatties?
I am an abrasive bitch sometimes, but I don't care for talking shit behind someone's back. I like to be up front with people, and it's USUALLY not a blessing... more of a curse. Meeting people from all over the country, and even the world... shows me a different way to be. I think I can learn from it, sort of combine a little cutsy pleasantries with my what you see is what you get thing? Maybe, I'll think on it.
I think we should end this on a high note, like Barb's Boobs... They are high and noteable!

I'm so excited, And I just can't hide it....

2011-09-28T22:44:00.001-07:00

I'm about to lose control and I think I like it....

I am finalizing my suitcase which is seriously overpacked... as usual.
I have brought enough clothes for a week, and I am staying 4 nights in Chicago.
I am afraid of being cold... so I have layers and layers...
I am relieved that the regular baseball season is officially over and my team broke their record of wins in a season... and is headed into the playoffs in first place. GO PHILLIES!
I am going to give and get about 100 hugs tomorrow, that's 2 per BOOB... so keep them coming.
I will save another 100 hugs for the Friday arrivals and the celebration of the Friday arrivals.
I am thinking of engaging in some shopping for exercise this weekend....
I will be eating something decadent... or maybe 3 things... LOL
I love my Roomies...Jen, Amey, and Julie.... and my adopted roomie Jessica who is taking me in when I am abandoned and alone.
I plan on looking up Marilyn's skirt... and probably some others. Ponder that!
I will miss my George, he's the Ying to my Yang.

The Facts of Life.... DiZneDiva Style!

2011-09-22T21:50:00.001-07:00

Fact 1~ Chocolate is the nectar of the Gods...it's the nectar of the Gods, the food of the Gods and The Spawn of the Devil....
Fact 2~ My Husband is a piece of meat, sexy Man Candy... and I find him Irresistible, and can't keep my hands off him...still after 2 decades.
Fact 3~ Fall is colder than I remember...
Fact 4~ I am over the moon excited that in a few short days... I'll be in Chicago with my Hanging Boobs, hanging with my beautiful BOOBS...
Fact 5~I'm thrilled that the Phillies finally dumped their slump... and pray they sweep the Braves so they can beat their record of 101 wins.... Fingers Crossed.
Fact 6~Have I mentioned that Chocolate makes everything better and worse at the same time?
Fact 7~I love pretzels of all kinds but Soft Pretzels are delicious... even when they clog my band like a unruly hairball and cause me to lie to myself that I will never eat even a bite again....
Fact 8~All of you who expect a fashion plate skinny bitch when I arrive in Chi-Town haven't been paying attention.... (I apologize to all you Fashion Plate Skinny Bitches, you know who you are, for taking your name in vain...Actually, you modest model type don't know you are any of the above so I take my apology back, I may need it when I put my foot deep into my mouth later...)
Fact 9~All this weight loss has made me look more my age, I am starting to look 40ish so I think I need to make sure I'm doing all I can to get my beautiful skin back, eating low-fat hasn't been the most important thing to me but it seems to end up that way... which has made my skin dry and flaky, and I hate it. I am looking into new skin regiments and upping my dose of flax seed oil and fish oil. I hear that a tablespoon of olive oil can help too, but it sounded a little witchdoctory to me. Any suggestions?
Fact 10~I am putting together a wardrobe for the weekend and I can see that I am between sizes... It is frumpy at best BUT It will revolve it around my favorite color.... Glitter.
Fact 11~Is it just me, or do you notice our Bloggers dropping off the face of the blogosphere? I miss you guys... where are you?
Fact 12~I just thought about how awesome chocolate covered pretzels are.... Chocolate makes everything better, even something as close to perfect as a pretzel.
Fact 13~There are no words for how excited I am to see you... in a few days, Yes...I am talking to you... and if you're not able to go this year... I hope to meet you next year.
Fact 14~I will be in Orlando, Florida in November from the 1st through the 18 or so... It is a working vacation for my George since he works for Disney still seasonally, but I will be able to play so let me know if you're gonna be around... I would love to see you.
Fact 15~My nephews are so magical... they sometimes make me wonder why we didn't want to have kids of our own, and after a couple days "playing" with them in the active lifestyle of a mother's helper... I remember why. It's fulfilling, but exhausting. I love them so much, but I also love sleep, spontaneous sexcapades, traveling and cruising, and coming&Going as we please... Which does not make for a devoted mother. Too selfish a lifestyle, I guess! But it sure is fun!
Fact 16~We will be celebrating our SWEET SIXTEEN wedding anniversary in a few weeks, although we have been kissed. I am not sure what we are doing to celebrate since my George works that night, but I'm sure we'll find something romantic to do. Maybe some of those Spontaneous Sexcapades I spoke of earlier, although speaking of it now, sorta takes some of the Spontaneity out of it...
Fact 17~I will be in the Disneyland/LA area in December from the 1st through the 9th, if anyone lives around there and wants to get together email me and let me know... I would love to see/meet some of you west coasters. You can also meet my George... off the blog post into reality.
Fact 18~ I really thought I would have more facts but I am mentality and physically drained.... but one last Fact, I am a Philly Girl... I am crude, using the F-word is like an artform to me, We use it as a noun, verb, adjective, adverb, and sometimes even a proposition. We made up new F-words, so we wouldn't bore of the main one... Even when we say FUDGE, it sounds street. I am proud of where I am from. See, I just ended the sentence with a proposition because I live outside the rules... LOL. I am honest and I don't like Fake people who pretend to be someone they're not. I am Sarcastic... I love to laugh and make others laugh, which means I am told that I don't take anything serious, but that's not it, I think humor can get you through your darkest moments. I am perfectly imperfect, and I am a work in progress... I try to learn something new everyday and I am bored by know-it-alls. I am a food addict, whose stress and depression, cause binges... even with a lapband. This is alot of facts, I guess, but I will be myself around you... I want you to know me.
Fact 19~The Fun begins in 4 days.... and we will never forget next weekend. I know that for sure, because I still remember Chicago... as seen through the eyes of a BOOB. My kind of Town, Chicago is... because of YOU.
Fact 20~ I am still not losing weight... after Chicago, I am throwing down big time... I have been eating well and staying active but not exercising. My Metabolism sucks! and the Doctor thinks I should have a revision surgery since the band probably wasn't the best choice for me... at my incredibly high original BMI and since I was more of a grazer than a big eater. I really need to get off this plateau, there will definitely be more time for plateaus in the 200's.

SEE YOU THURSDAY OR FRIDAY, as the case may be... BTW, I am a hugger...LOL

Does anyone have a winter coat for me?

2011-09-18T13:56:00.001-07:00

I am cold... already and since I moved back home to Philly, my Florida Jackets are just not cutting it. We are struggling with money right now so I was hoping that one of you skinny minis shrunk out of your winter coats... I would really appreciate it. I am short on winter clothes of all kinds... hint, hint! If you are going to Chicago and you can bring it with you, I would really appreciate it.*********** I should have mentioned... It has to be 2x or bigger to fit this curvy butt...

In Other news.... Our Phillies Clinched the National League East Championship last night and We were at the game to see it. They have won the National League East Championship...for 5 years in a row now. The Playoffs are coming soon and I can't wait to see how far they can go! I am so happy to be home... Go Phils!

Big Sexy!

2011-09-15T23:35:00.000-07:00

I have a new Reality show obsession.... Big Sexy. At first I was unsure, since I am really tired of these shows making Big Girls feel bad about themselves and/or mock them. It turns out, that the show shows 5 "Curvy" Girls of various sizes living in New York, like the Big Girls' version of Sex in the City. The Girls are sexy, confident and single... looking for men and acceptance in the "Overly Thin" fashion industry. There are 3 plus sized models, a makeup artist, a fashion designer, and a stylist. They are amazing... You should check it out!

Food... A Love-Hate Relationship.

2011-09-11T19:30:00.000-07:00

Well, I've been realizing that Food is a nuisance to me. What I want to eat, Is not what I should eat, and what I need to eat, doesn't interest me. I am burned out. It has been almost 18 months and I hate thinking so much about what I can do to get off this plateau or what I should do to jumpstart a half dead metabolism. What I am doing... Isn't working. I usually eat right... but I am bored with all that gets me by and I get annoyed with not being able to afford to try the recipes that I think will awake my bored sleeping appetite. I still want sweets... anything made with sugar will do. Even Sugar-free stuff can engulf me in a binge. So I am staying away, which fills me with regret since my weight won't budge. Why am I staying away from all the treats, if I am not losing weight? I went to my new Lapband Doctor who was thrilled with my progress, but I told him... This progress is stalled. I had this same progress almost 6 months ago and something is wrong, besides the occasional giving in to sweets. He told me that at my high original BMI, I should have been encouraged to have the bypass or the sleeve. I explained that I originally went in for the Gastric Bypass because that's all I knew but when the Surgeon suggested the Lapband and I did some research, I thought since it is helpful with maintenance it would be great for me. The Sleeve was never mentioned because it wasn't that widely used here in the US almost 2 years ago. I really have been thinking that I should have trusted myself to have gastric bypass, but I thought I would fail and gain back the weight like alot of people do... and I may even do that with my lapband. Anyway, the Doctor is going to do some tests... basically, an Upper GI and some blood tests. And we'll take it from there. I am concerned that I get stuck on all kinds of things, except everything unhealthy. Twice last week, I felt stuck on a greek yogurt. I haven't had a fill in like a year.... why do I feel like I keep getting tighter instead of looser? Anyway, in summary... I workout and have severe pain in both knees, hips and back. So I just try to be more active and workout only in the water... which limits my gym options since this is the great White north and outdoor pools are closed half the year. I eat right most of the time but am struggling with Stuck incidents and boredom with my regular menu options. I have to watch my finances which keeps me from trying alot of different menu options at one time. And I wonder when I will get over my obsession with Sweets, or if I will ever get over it. I am concerned that this incredibly high weight is what my body likes since I spent most of my adult life around this weight. Should I be happy that I lost over 130 pounds and my health has done a complete turnaround? Because this weight is now wearing on me? I felt better for a long while and now I am feeling worn out and tired all the time... These and other random whinings will be answered on the next Episode of Stuck in the Middle with Food.

New Product... Flatout's Fold-its. Yum!

2011-09-05T15:19:00.000-07:00

Delicious, really good! I use them when I eat tuna, or chicken salad. I also eat lunch meat on them. And I even had a turkey burger the other day on them. 90 calories, 7 grams of dietary fiber and 7 grams of protein. They have all different kinds but I always choose bread products with at least 5 grams of dietary fiber per serving. So There was only a couple that I tried. This one and the whole wheat with flax. They also have slider size. If you're missing bread, this may be a great swap for you.

5 Grain Flax

« View All Foldit^tm Artisan Flatbread Products

90 Calories
Excellent Source of ALA Omega 3
Excellent Source of Fiber
43% Less Net Carbs than sliced bread
Tasty!

INGREDIENTS: WATER, WHOLE WHEAT FLOUR, VITAL WHEAT GLUTEN, OAT FIBER, GRAIN BLEND (CUT WHEAT, WHEAT BRAN, CUT RYE, CORN MEAL, BARLEY GRITS, BULGAR WHEAT, STEEL CUT OATS, OAT FLAKES, YELLOW CORN GRITS, BARLEY FLAKES, RYE CHOPS, HULLED MILLET, WHEAT FLAKES), FLAX SEED MEAL, SOYBEAN OIL, YEAST, CONTAINS LESS THAN 2% OF EACH OF THE FOLLOWING: MALTITOL, SUGAR, MOLASSES, SODIUM ACID PYROPHOSPHATE, BAKING SODA, WHEAT PROTEIN ISOLATE, FUMARIC ACID, PRESERVATIVES (POTASSIUM SORBATE, SODIUM PROPIONATE), CELLULOSE GUM, GUAR GUM, CALCIUM SULFATE, XANTHAN GUM, SALT, L-CYSTEINE, CALCIUM PEROXIDE, ENZYMES. CONTAINS: WHEAT AND SOYBEANS. MANUFACTURED IN A FACILITY THAT ALSO PROCESSES PRODUCTS CONTAINING MILK AND CHEESE.

BOOBS Survey... My Life's an Open Book!

2011-09-01T19:01:00.000-07:00

How did you pick your blog name? ....I came up with my blog name because I love American Pie and Michelle was always my favorite scene stealing character... the rest of the name is basically me playing a game show with my journey. I had 300 pounds to lose to get to my surgeon's goal. My goal is not that much but it sounds more dramatic when I say 1 vs 300 instead of 1 vs 225.
When did you start Blogging? ... I started 6 weeks after I was banded, in May of 2010. I was following several blogs, that I had found on lapbandtalk.com. I had always wanted to journal and never could get started even though I have about a hundred blank journals sitting around my house. I am journaling for myself but I found myself journaling for you too, I mean, I learned more from youse than I did from all the seminars, doctors, and nurses along the way... maybe I had something to teach too.
Theme of Blog? Really, I guess I would say it's a random mussings blog with a Lapband basic theme, Weight Loss Friendly and Unfriendly alike... I accept all followers, I am an equal opportunity blogger. I am willing to bore anyone who'll listen with the details and ramblings of my life.
Did you go to BOOBS 2010? Hell Yeah, I did. I came, I saw, I walked, I sang, I laughed, I giggled, I met greatness... and made lifetime friends. I can't wait to redo it all in a few short weeks... I will miss my sweet Amy Sunshine though. XOXO
When were you banded? March 23rd, 2010
How much have you lost so far? I have lost about 127 pounds... and have gained and lost a few here and there over an unending these mast 6 months but I am getting some tests and a fill soon so I make sure my band is doing it's job.
What are you most looking forward to at BOOBs? I look forward to meeting all you newbies and seeing all you oldbies... but most of all I look forward to hanging with my roomies.
What/who do you hope to find/see/accomplish at BOOBs 2011? I can't wait to see how much easier I get around than last year, and I look forward to all the great activities that the committee and other BOOBS have lined up for us.
Children? Pets? We didn't want children of our own but we have a furry son... Mr Q. And we love our Nephews and nieces like crazy!
Who is your roomie? My Roomies are Jen(It IS all about Me!), Amey(Donut Butt), and Julie(Ms M)
What day do you arrive? I arrive on Thursday... Yay!
What airport/flight/time? Midway, around 12:30 noon... Weren't we supposed to keep the details to a minimum? Wanna know my blood type and political party too?
What events are you signed up for? I am going to the Drag show thursday, The get-together and Second City on Friday, The Dinner on Saturday, and filling in some shopping in Chinatown, the Marilyn Monroe statue, and other sightseeing in between and all day sunday.... I am actually coming home on Monday.(Who else will still be there til monday?)
Hobbies? Reading, Scrapbooking, Travelling, Movies, and our amazing Sports' Teams especially the Phillies.
Career? I am a Lady of Leisure these days, I will probably have to go back to work eventually but for now, I am just concentrating on my health and weight loss, or lack there of...
Single? Married? In a relationship? I am married to my best friend, the man of my dreams, my ideal mate, Soul Mate if you will... and I shall call his name, My George.
Your birthday month? June... I am a Cancer on the Cusp of Gemini... and I am a good mix of both. Even though I am a Cancer, I am mostly Gemini in nature.
What do you want other BOOBs to know about you? Ummmm, I am an open book, I think you pretty much know all there is to know about me. But, I am a Cafe World nut on Facebook... That's my replacement addiction for food, if I can't eat food, I can certainly make it virtually.

Worst Week... Reality, It's not just for TV.

2011-08-27T20:51:00.000-07:00

What can I say about a week that kept getting worse? You know the phrase... "At least It couldn't get any worse..." I stopped saying it, because it can get worse and will, sometimes!

Monday~I started the week gazing at a $200 water bill... It can only get better, right?
Tuesday~My husband was cleaning the family room and moved the chaise lounge to vacuum under it, and after a series of mishaps... Our 50" Flat Screen got cracked...At least, your husband cleans... Ummm, ok there's that and At least It can't get any worse. That afternoon, I was alone in the house when I experienced my first Earthquake. My husband rushed home thinking a tree fell over and hit the house, and left again thinking I was losing it, big time. But, no... Earthquake. What's gonna happen next?
Wednesday, I wake up and look out the window to see my car is gone... Reprocessed, after getting behind in payments when my husband was out of work for 3 months... we were paying double payments for a couple months now trying to get caught up. They promised us to defer the past due to the end of our loan, but must have been leading us on to get as much money as they could from us. And they took our car back, with all our stuff inside it... in the middle of the night. Who did we screw over in our past lives?
Thursday, We find out that we have to go to Kensington in Philadelphia to pick up our items from our car... Kensington is the working class neighborhood where my Mother grew up, but now it is not a nice blue collar family neighborhood anymore... It's more of a drive-by ganghood these days. I was given the run around all day by the Repo guy... and didn't get my stuff back. I can't believe how these people treat those of us who are struggling in this bad economy... but my Fellow BOOBs brightened my day with a wonderful BOOB of the day post about me where my good friends said wonderful glowing things about me and I didn't feel like such a loser deadbeat anymore. The sun will come out tomorrow.
Friday, We went to the ghetto to get our stuff and even a worse part of town then planned... North Philly. Wow! but after a horrible experience... We had our stuff and we have each other. We were hardly using that car anyway, because this is the big city and we like the subway... it's cheaper than GAS. Like One Republic sings... This Could really be a Good Life, a Good, Good Life!
Saturday~ One Disaster a week... That's for WIMPS. How about a Hurricane? or some Tornadoes for good measure? As it rains and rains outside, I am thankful to be safe and to have friends and family who love me. Like a Postman, neither rain, nor sleet, nor Gloom of night will keep me from my Appointed Blog Post for I am a Postman too... LOL
Sunday~Full Circle, all week I have been saying, "I just need to get through this week" since my Great Aunt's 80th birthday party is Sunday where I will spend the day surrounded by my loving family swimming in my Uncle's pool. Well, due to Hurricanes and heavy rain... The Party is cancelled. But on the Bright Side, We all have puddles deep enough to swim in and our basement is flooding as we speak, Who doesn't like an indoor pool? Should I ask Marnie to remove the curse on me? (That is a True Blood reference for you Basic Cablers...)

In Summary, My Week was bad... but My Life is Good. "Sometimes there's Airplanes I can't jump out, Sometimes there's bullshit that don't work now, We are God of Stories, but please tell me... What there is to complain about? When you're Happy like a Fool, Let it Take you over... When Everything is Out, You got to Take it In.... Oh, This has Gotta be the Good Life" Two other things come to mind... From the book of Mark in the Bible "It is Easier for a Camel to pass through the Eye of a Needle, than a Rich Man to enter the Kingdom of God" I guess, better to suffer here, than for Eternity.... Let's end on a more positive note, From It's a Wonderful Life... "No man is a failure who has Friends! I may not be rich in funds but I am rich in FUNs. I love you all!

You are the Wind beneath my batwings!

2011-08-21T12:50:00.000-07:00

Me and Jen on the EL from the airport.... Yay! Chicago!

Me and last year's roomies.... 3 of us are back together this year with a new roomie.

You are the wind beneath my Batwings.... I told a very good friend of mine that on facebook.... the other day. Her name is Jen and here is our story.

Jen-Whoever of you hasn't met my roomie Jen yet... hopefully will get to meet her next month in Chicago. Jen who you may know about from "It is all about me..." ... But she is sweet, loving, funny, and so friggin' supportive... It's hard to believe there is that good a friend out there waiting for you, at this age. It is easier to meet new friends when you're in school or even at work but for me... not so much. I hang on to friends who I probably should have let go of because replacing even the worst candidates is difficult as you get older. When I found you all.... I didn't expect to get as much out of this friendship as I have, but I am so happy to be wrong. Jen is a caregiver, she is a guidance counseler who loves kids and animals. She has her own little farm with a Donkey, and a goat...

Jen and I had wrote back and forth on facebook a few times before Chicago last year. We found out that we were getting into Midway airport at the same time, which meant we could meet at the airport and ride the EL together. That was gonna be great, since like everyone else... I was nervous about meeting 50 or so women most of whom I had never met before. A few weeks later, after her roommate was struggling to find the money to go and was considering cancelling... My roommate and I combined into their double room. It saved us all money and we had a great time. So good a time, that we are sharing a room this year too.

I found a friend... a really GOOD one. And it's all because of Chicago. I think whoever is thinking of going still but isn't sure... You will meet alot of new friends and come home a different person... It's like 40 days away, I can't wait to see my old friends and meet some new ones.

Pity Party... Table for ONE.

2011-08-13T18:00:00.000-07:00

I am hanging tough... on this plateau still. but...

I haven't been exercising at all.
I have been eating things I don't usually.
I have been pretty depressed lately.
I haven't been feeling great(See above where I told you I haven't been eating very well)
I have been getting in my protein and fiber daily.
I have been getting my water in daily.
I have been getting most of the vitamins in daily.
I have been healthy food binging... again.

I am wondering why my metabolism has to be this bad. I have to bust my ass to lose 1 pound, and I hate it. I wish I had been smart and had the Gastric bypass. If I had, and I was eating mostly healthy like I am... I would have lost about 200 pounds by now. I wasn't afraid of the major surgery... I was more afraid of not eating right and gaining the weight back since you don't have to work as hard to lose it because of the malabsorption. It may be the LAZINESS talking... since the depression makes me not feel like doing anything at all. I need to cut all the crap and start DIETING. I wanted to do it by eating healthy and exercising but the truth is... It's taking too long. I need to lower my calories to 1000 and get to the gym. If I cut the carbs to less than 50g a day... That definitely would help. I feel like having a pity party... but party's without carbs suck!

BYOC... I have been busy but I keep missing them each week... Here it is.

2011-08-06T23:42:00.000-07:00

BYOC... Sunday Edition.

1) I am going to pick a person in your life-Not knowing if you have a Good/Bad, Existent or Non-Existent relationship with them-And your Mission is to pick 5 words or traits or thoughts to describe them...

Your Paternal Grandmother...

Strict and Practical

Extremely Hard Life... She was wrinkled like a prune when I was born, She died when I was only 13, It was the first death I really remember, and I really struggled with it since I adored her so much. I learned to speak German to speak to her, and never spoke it again after she died.

Juicyfruit Gum & Hard Candy in a Dish

Pulling and Rolling Strudel... My brother poked his head through the middle of it once and she was so mad.

German... Strong, and Extraordinary.

2)What's your all-time favorite color to paint your nails? and your toes?

Blue, all shades.... and it glitter a color?

3)Do you get along with your parents well?

I was always a Daddy's Girl, my Mom and I were also very close. They gave us everything we wished for growing up even though we were quite poor. They went without so we could be spoiled. They had a great love affair, my Dad spoiled my Mom something awful and I always remember them being very loving toward each other. My Dad died in 2003, after a 46 day fight with Pancreatic Cancer and I miss him alot everyday. When he died, a part of my Mother died with him and she's never been the same since, We are not as close now... but I still see her often and talk to her on the phone almost everyday.

4)Speaking of Rainbows-Rank the colors in the order you prefer...

Blue, Red, Orange, Yellow, Purple, Green, Pink

5)Repeat Question... How was your life in real life and in blogland this week?

It was a busy week, we went to NYC for the day, Spent a day hanging around downtown Philly, planned a cruise for November, Went to the Maroon 5/Train concert, and saw my nephews several times since they were in Ocean City, MD the week before so we had to catch up. In Blogland, I complained, bitched and moaned. I summarized, I theorized, I wrapped up... and I got alot of support and love from my best girlfriends.

A Whirlwind Week.... In a Long-Winded Nutshell!

2011-08-06T17:56:00.000-07:00

Well, I am exhausted... and sore. Since my friend from Orlando was visiting this week I have been running around all week(Actually Walking... but running seems more dramatic.).

We were supposed to go to NYC for the day on Wednesday. Since it is only about 1 1/2 hours from here we go often, but we usually do it at a relaxing pace. Wednesday was a rainy day and my friend has never been to NYC before so I encouraged him to switch days and go on Thursday. So Wednesday, we met my Mom for lunch( He loves my Mom and says she's the Mother he never had... And I sometimes wish she was the Mother I never had... LOL)

Thursday, we headed to Jersey City, where we park and take the train into the City. We got off the train at the WTC. And by then I was starving... but it seems regular folks want to get a snack to hold them over. I rarely eat snacks... but into the Rite Aid I go looking for a "Healthy" option. I saw some Beef Jerky but no Turkey Jerky... and they had greek yogurt but it is hard to eat on the go, and I usually only eat one a day to keep the carbs down, luckily I had a Atkins Daybreak bar in my purse but I grabbed a big bottle of water and a bag of almonds that I could munch on throughout the day and share with my friends and my George. We took the subway to Times Square and did some shopping. Then they wanted to stop for another snack. I am not a grazer anymore... Hello! My husband was eating a very tempting Cupcake which I ate a few bites of and I got another water.... Hydrate! Hydrate! We walked to Rockafeller Center so they could check out the fountain and I showed them the tiny area where the ice rink is in winter... We walked to Central Park. I was hungry again by then, and we hadn't really eaten all day. I munched on some Almonds... We were pretty much done our day by then... So we took the Subway to the Village and were going to get the Path(Train) to Jersey City. My Friend saw a Pizza Parlor and he so wanted to try NY Pizza.(Over-rated, and it's the same foldable stuff we have in Philly, You really have to know a good place not just randomly hit a Parlor you walk by... LOL) I was standing staring at the Pizza(Which I don't have alot of luck with Post-Band, but if I do try to eat any pizza, it has to be thin and crispy) I got a slice of the Chicken and Broccoli, since I could eat the toppings off of it. I ate 2 bites and felt full, My George ate the rest. When we got back to the car, I was thrilled that my Friend was driving back home... and I just enjoyed the ride, I always drive.... It was nice to have someone else take the wheel.

That night, I was so sore and in so much pain, that i hoped it would subside after a good night's sleep... It wasn't. When I woke up yesterday morning, I was still sore and hurting all over. I picked my friend up at the airport, he returned his rental car... I took them on a driving tour of Philly. I showed them alot. Then we parked the car at my house and picked up George. We took the train downtown and over to Camden, NJ for an awesome Concert... It was Train(My Favorite) and Maroon 5, and Gavin DeGraw opened up for them. It was a great concert. Pat Monahan clasped my hand when he walked around the audience during Marry Me... He was incredibly sweaty and I was on Cloud 9. You all know my weakness for the Black Haired Blue Eyed Irishmen(See... My George)... After the Concert, we walked by Gavin DeGraw's RV and he came out eating a sandwich so we got to meet him and I took a photo of my George with him. It was a great end to a great night.

In Other News, My scale is definitely broken... I am not sure where I am with my weight and I need to find out. My calories have been pretty low(Yesterday was 840, weird?) But even though I've been walking alot, I haven't been to the gym in a week. So, I need to find out where I am with my Weight.

Fill 'er up! And see the Sights!

2011-08-02T23:41:00.000-07:00

I NEED A FILL.... BIG TIME! I am hungry almost all day. I wake up and I am not really hungry but I definitely could eat(That means I am sorta hungry, which feels strange since even before I was banded, I wasn't a breakfast person... and never have I felt like eating when I wake up since my band was installed, I am a protein shake, greek yogurt kind of gal) Well, I got my insurance switched over last month... but I have been playing phone tag with my new bariatric doctor(Hopefully) and I am starting to think that it's not worth all the effort.(Dr. Noel Williams is a big cheese in Bariatrics and I did alot of research and decided that since the Penn Bariatric Center is huge and has amazing reviews, including that I've been going to their support groups and you don't have to wait to get a fill with the surgeon, the PA does it. I really hope I get a call back tomorrow. I need to get in there and have them accept me, since I had my surgery elsewhere.

It is 2:51am and I am struggling to sleep because I am hungry again... especially because of how close I have been watching what I eat lately... to keep my calories down still since I am eating more than usual. My calories have been landing closer to 1500 instead of my normal 1200. I don't want to start gaining weight but I hate the hunger feeling...It sucks. Once you feel what it is without it for so long. Hunger... Why must you haunt me? I thought I felt it coming back, but I blamed it on my TOM... but I was right. I really need a fill. I have no energy from cutting the carbs. I have been thinking of doing some diet like Dukan or Atkins or whatever to get myself back together but I think that the fill is most important. If I don't use my tool right, the deprivation will cause serious cravings.

My friend from Orlando, who I worked with at DisneyWorld is visiting the area this week. I look forward to seeing him and dragging him all over Downtown Philly and NYC. I am going to show off my Roots. Let him ring my Liberty Bell(They actually don't let you touch it, although I have sneaked a couple times), Watch him run up the Art Museum steps like Rocky, take him to Chinatown, South Street, Boathouse Row, the Reading Terminal Market, and I hope he'll want to see some of where our Nation got it's start.(Why aren't people more interested in our History?) He's never been to NYC, and I haven't done any of the touristy things there in over a decade so we'll see what trouble we can get into there too.

20 questions... and answers?

2011-08-01T14:35:00.000-07:00

I decided to cheat and steal this survey from Steph who stole from Banded Bella who stole from Sam. So hopefully, we'll get to know each other better... Or at least I will look like I posted more often.

1)What is your occupation right now?

I am a Trophy Wife mainly concentrating on getting my health back in check. I am also the Family Travel Agent...

2)What color are your socks right now?

White socks earlier for the gym but I get them off as quickly as I can... I am not a socks person which was fine in Orlando these past 10+ years... but now that I am back home in Philly, I am going to have to get used to wearing shoes and socks again. To be honest, there was a long time when slip on shoes(flip flops, etc) were my only option without involving my husband in putting my socks and shoes on and off... but I can put my own socks and shoes on nowadays and I am loving every minute of it.

3)What are you listening to right now? Rain and thunder(A little too close for comfort)... It is relaxing me, but I am glad I am not out in it. I am going through my clothes and getting stuff together for good will and storage for later. As I do that, I am listening to Christina Perri's new album(Another Philly Girl).

4)What was the last thing you ate?

I had grilled chicken and a salad mix of Arugala and Baby Spinach with Raspberry Vinagrette dressing(I found a delicious one that's only 35 calories for 2 tbsp. It was a yummy lunch.

5)Can you drive Stick Shift?

I was given a brief tutoral by my Dad like 100 years ago but I have never driven one... and don't plan on starting now.

6)Last Person you spoke to on the phone...

My husband calls me every day on his lunch break... but I am more of a texter so mostly, I text. I do love hearing his voice though, He's the Bees' Knees!(I am not sure what that old timers' phrase means but It's fun and It is a positive saying for sure!

7)Do you like the person you stole this blog from?

Of course, why would I be reading people's blogs that annoy me? I don't have that much free time. I read alot of blogs even though I don't comment every time and I adore you all... I mean, anyone who can put up with all my whining and drama deserves a comment but I need more than 24 hours in a day.

8)How old are you today?

Didn't anyone ever tell you it's rude to ask a lady her age? Luckily, I'm not usually a lady... so I am 42 years old in my body and 22 in my mind.

9)What's your favorite sport to watch on TV?

I am a HUGE Phillies Phan.... So I watch almost every game on TV and go to see as many as I can live.... Baseball, which Steph says is like watching paint dry... which is it To Me too, like watching paint drying on the nude bodies of True Blood's men... LOL. I also love Hockey and Football but only my teams...Flyers and Eagles respectfully.

10)What is your favorite drink?

It used to be sweet tea, but I don't drink anything with more than 5 calories unless it's a protein shake... but I really love Root Beer. I just take a sip every once in a while.

11)Have you ever dyed your hair?

I love my hair and I am glad I never really dyed it but when I was a teenager I wanted to try some other color and my Mom always told me that I wouldn't get my natural color back the same again... and It's gotten darker every year since... but I do highlight it once in a decade or so.

12)Favorite Food?

I think my favorite food are all Desserts, hence the robust curves.... but I really love Peanut Butter, It is a trigger food, but I really love it!

13)What is the last movie that you watched?

I haven't watched any movies at home recently, but we did see Friends with Benefits in the theater last week.

14)Favorite Day of the Year?

I guess I would have to say Christmas but I am not sure if I like Christmas Day or Christmas Eve more... they are both great.

15)How do you vent Anger?

I am a Philly Girl at Heart so I use alot of 4 letter words... and think of new ways to use the F word. I don't get angry alot, but I do sometimes struggle with Road Rage, I am not sure how some of these folks passed their driving test...LOL

16)What was your favorite Toy as a Child?

I know it's shocking, coming from a Fatty, but I loved my Easy Bake Oven... which is strange since I don't like to cook much.

17)What is your favorite season?

I can't wait for Autumn because It has always been my favorite and It's the one I missed most in Florida. I love seeing the leaves change colors, pumpkin patches, fall festivals, halloween, and the nice mild breezy weather that goes with it.

18)Cherries or Blueberries?

I am not a huge fan of either. I like Wild Black cherry and those maracino cherries that go on the top of a sundae or in a Shirley Temple drink...LOL I also love Blueberry muffins but not blueberries themselves. I do love Blackberries, raspberries, and Strawberries though.

19)Do you want your friends to blog this survey?

Yes, I'd love to learn new things about you all. Fun!

20)Where is your favorite place to escape?

I love Cruising, It is the best vacation since you don't have to worry about where to eat, how to get here or there, where to stay... It is a great escape, but my everyday escape is in my George's arms. I feel safe there and more relaxed than anywhere else. I could lie there listening to his heart for hours.

21)Favorite TV Show?

I love TV... I can't pick just one but these are my top 10. True Blood, Dexter, Modern Family, Hot in Cleveland, GLEE, The Big Bang Theory, Criminal Minds, Marriage Ref, Dancing With the Stars, and Gene Simmons Family Jewels(I think Gene Simmons is amazing, He's one of the people I would most like to meet).... I love repeats of some of my favorites from the past like That 70's Show, Family Guy, and Ghostwhisperer.

22)Living Arrangements?

My George and I have regressed and moved back home with my Mother-in-Law. I thought it was temporary but I really like it here and we are able to travel more and help her make ends meet.

23)When was the last time you cried?

I watched the Gene Simmons Family Jewels season finale the other night and when he finally asked Shannon(his live-in girlfriend of 28 years that he has and raised 2 awesome kids together with) to marry him. I was so moved by his proposal, that I cried. I actually get emotionally involved with movies, TV Shows, and even commericals sometimes.

24)What is on the floor of your closet?

Baskets with purses and hats in them....

25)Who is the friend you have had the longest?

My Friend Lisa who I met in 10th grade is the one I've had the longest. We still spend alot of time together. One of my closest friends is also my Aunt who is a little over 4 years older than me, we were basically raised together and we talk all the time and spend alot of time together(We are more like sisters, my Mom is the oldest and she is the youngest, they were born 18 years apart)...

26)What did you do last night?

After George got off of work, we went to the Texas Roadhouse for dinner. It was great. I love it there. I order off the kids' menu, sirloin tips and broccoli or grilled chicken and broccoli. But we always share the fried pickles appetizer. They are yummy and probably the lowest calorie friend food ever...LOL

27)What are you most afraid of?

Losing George, when my Mom lost my Dad, a part of her died with him and she's struggled to find herself ever since. I can't imagine life without my George.

28)Plain, Cheese, or Spicy hamburger?

Well, Turkey burger with alot of spices... I eat my burgers without a roll so they have to be good.

29)Favorite Dog Breed?

I don't care as long as It's a rescue dog. I don't believe in buying bred dogs but I do like them smaller. My dog is a jack russell mix of some sort, just an adorable rescue mutt.

30)Favorite Day of the Week?

Any day that George is off work is special, I love when he's off during the week and we go downtown and shop, hit Reading Terminal Market and Chinatown or even South Street. Weekend days off are not as good but more relaxing. Just vegging out.

31)How many states have you lived in?

Only a Few... Pennsylvania, New Jersey, New York, and Florida.

32)Diamonds or Pearls?

Well, I think Pearls are sexy but I love sparkle so I am leaning toward diamonds. I prefer CZs since the fake man made stuff sparkles more and is more affordable....LOL

33)What is your favorite Flower?

I like the tropical look of the Hibiscus, the smell of roses, and the fun of gerber daisies.

Well, What are your answers?

What a Week! or should I say "What a Weak!"

2011-07-28T23:20:00.000-07:00

Well, I have been having car troubles and I am hoping to get it up and running soon but since I live right outside Philadelphia, I use the car alot less than I did in Florida... and I have been considering cutting the expense. It is so expensive to own a car with the insurance, car payments, gas, tolls, and maintenance... and public transportation is alot cheaper and I can read, listen to my IPod, text, talk on the phone or just talk to whoever's with me, myself, or even strangers.... These are things you really can't shouldn't do while driving. With Public Trans I also get more exercise since walking is a part of the public trans lifestyle.... Am I crazy for thinking about this?

I have been simplifying my life... a little at a time. I went to support group last night with a friend who is pre-band... She and I went to high school together and we have alot in common. It makes me wonder why we weren't good friends then but the timing must not have been right. She tells me that I am inspirational.... lol... I tell her it's lucky she doesn't see me late at night munching on handfuls of captain crunch. The support group is at the University of Penn Hospital, which I am sure most of you have heard of since it is all Ive league and such. I like the group but it is mostly pre-band folk and I feel like a prize pig on display at a county fair... plus, I don't really look like a success story yet... but I don't mind being the center of attention, much. There is a post-band group that is for people who are 6 months out or more, and I may try that one too but I will still keep going to this other one since my friend is pre-band.

I think I need a fill... but I haven't started with a new doctor yet. I had my insurance switch over on July 1st but I am a slacker... I will make an appt with the top doctor at Penn. I probably won't even meet him since I hear he does the surgeries but the PAs do the fills/followups/maintenance stuff. I will call tomorrow, I will call tomorrow... I will call tomorrow. I'll probably forget again...

My eating had been pretty good but my exercise routine is off because of my broken down car... I need to get on the bus to go to the gym, but tonight I did do to a Aqua Zumba class with my friend from the support group/high school. I don't want to tell you her name to respect her privacy but... Her name is a KISS song. Clue! When we got to the Y, the Zumba instructor wasn't there so we had another girl do a regular water aerobics class which was an awesome workout. She did some strength training, cardio, and pilates stretching... It was quite the workout. I think I am going to mix in some more water aerobics to my exercise schedule. I only stopped because it was like senior social hour at my Y in Orlando. Which would be fine if they weren't in the way chatting... and tripping me.

I want to jump start my weight loss again. I know I will never lose as fast as I did in the beginning but I would like some more consistancy. I am thinking of doing some type of diet to get me back on track. Like Atkins, or a cleanse... I did to find a way to stop the night hungers. I do great all day and I am starving at night.

I guess I've bored you enough with my summary of events... I am still fighting the good fight and I look forward to seeing you all in Chicago... and if you're not going. It's not too late! It's a great time! No one should miss!

Weekly Whine... and a little cheese too.

2011-07-23T20:57:00.000-07:00

Whine #1~I have been busting my ass at the gym all this past week and I was rewarded with my TOM, intense heat, bloating, weird TOM cravings and binging, and more plateauing on the scale.

Whine#2~I can't help mentioning the heat yet again, I mean last summer I was living in Orlando, and had about 100 more pounds of fat and I wasn't ever this hot. I did expect to be hotter by losing all this weight, but I thought I'd be hotter figuratively, not literally.

Whine#3~My BFF who I have known 25+ years found out that another friend of mine is referred to get a lapband... and she went on and on about how people are using WLS as the end all be all, instead of pushing away from the table and getting up off the couch... She said this TO ME. I don't know what to think about it, I have a lapband, she knows it and she knows how hard I work to lose weight. How can we expect people who don't understand lapband surgery to realize that It is still hard work, If our closest friends who watch us in our everyday life don't? I am so disappointed in her comments. When I confronted her during this soapbox speech, She told me I'm the exception... not the rule. She's a bit of a Know-It-All and it's pretty annoying but you take the good with the bad so I've put up with it. BUT when she pretends to know more than I do about something like lapband surgery... COME ON! I asked her how many people that she personally know who have had WLS? ONE, Just me? I know quite a few more than that, and I only know one or two who aren't trying to follow their doctor's orders, eat right, and exercise. And they both had Gastric Bypass. I don't know any bandster who isn't trying to "Do the right thing"... most of the time. So, I wonder? Does She think I am sitting on my ass and not working at this? She went to the gym with me twice, watched my work outs, and has stayed over my house several times since I moved home... so she sees what I eat, and what I don't eat. I am at a loss. I know I need to forget this and move on, but It keeps creeping back in to my thoughts.

Last Whine(I promise)~My Nephews have been away all week in Ocean City Maryland... on a family vacation, one that my brother really needed. I have missed them terribly but they came home today and I will be seeing them tomorrow at a family birthday pool party. That's the cheesy part. I love my nephews!

CyberBully....

2011-07-20T19:45:00.000-07:00

While Watching the ABC Family movie, CyberBully....

I realize that these girls have haunted us or been us most of our lives, even before computers and the Internet changed things....

It should never be easy to show hate.... We should be fighting every hateful urge in our bodies, everyday in everyway. It is human nature to get angry and want revenge, but we don't have to stoop to a level beneath ourselves to get it. Revenge comes when you overcome adversity, when you prove people wrong, when you are happy and live your life to the fullest. We all have Bullies... even the Bullies have Bullies.
I consider myself a good person, but I definitely have wanted to call someone a Bitch on the Internet and in real life. I have wanted to call someone ugly, when they call me Fat or say At least I can lose some weight, but you will always be ugly. When I say Ugly... I meant on the inside but I don't know where that person is coming from when they call me names. Was their mother abusive to them about their weight their whole life?
Putting other people down is something people do to pull themselves up... So I guess the best way to make them stop is to say something nice back. Call me Fat and I'll tell you that you have a gorgeous smile. They need the compliment more than I do.... I mean, I know I'm fat, but do they know that they have pretty eyes? Do they know that I wish that I didn't struggle with my weight? Do they know that I own a mirror? Everyone always looks prettier when they smile... so Smile in the face of adversity.
Bullying only makes small minds feel bigger... but it doesn't last and they have to escalate to keep the feeling of superiority. To feel good about yourself surround yourself with people who love... not people who hate, notice the good in people(No matter how small the good may be), but most of all notice the good in yourself(and work toward making the changes you need to feel better)...
Mothers... and Fathers... Raise your children to love all. We are all beautiful, no matter what our color, race, size, or type... If you raise a Bully, you probably are a Bully. Teach your children equality, and to treat others as you would want to be treated yourself. Let your kids know that they can change the world one day at a time... They can stomp out indifference. If they see someone getting bullied online, stick up for them... or tell someone. Indifference is worse than the hate... It keeps the hate alive.

I'm sorry for getting all After School Special on you but, I am lucky that I have such an amazing support network and some people don't. Here is a safe place, where we can feel good about our progress, revel in our successes, and dwell in our slip ups. No one is called Fat here... We are all safe to be ourselves and to love ourselves.

Midnight Confessional....

2011-07-18T20:53:00.000-07:00

I was thinking about calories and lying to myself about them....

If I can't find the exact item in myfitnesspal that I ate... I always want to chose the lowest in calories, fat, carbs... and the highest in protein. Does this mean I am eating the healthiest one? No, It means that perception is 9/10 of reality. If I believe that I am staying within my calories... than It must be true. (What's really funny is that I never counted calories before I was banded. All the diets I've ever tried have been cutting carbs and they've all worked but I thought since this portion control this is so important for us... try counting calories.)
I love Cake... all sweets actually. I would eat cake for every meal, no protein, no veggies, well... maybe I'll eat carrot cake once in a while. Luckily, Cake is not as easy to come by these days... There are moosey things, pie, cookies, pastries, etc but most of the cakes in restaurants is ice cream really. And since I don't bring sweets in the house... I hardly ever get to eat it, unfortunately or fortunately... depending on how you look at it.
Back to calorie counting for another moment... My surgeon would never really give a direct answer to certain questions. Like how much protein grams should I eat?, how many calories should I be eating a day?, how much weight should I be losing a week?, How much exercise should I be doing?... He would give answers like as many as you can, as few as you can, it fluxuates, Exercise will cause you to be more hungry... just try to be more active. It was frustrating because I was so used to dieting that I wanted a rule book.... not a lifestyle. Eventually, I got the response that I should be eating about 800 calories a day and I stopped asking questions. (I thought 800 calories was a ridiculous goal but if I strip away the empty calories, extra carbs, unlean, sweets, and just ate small meals~Lean and Green... 800 calories would work fine, but I still eat about 1200 a day)
The Loose skin sucks... Weight loss is not all glamourous, My hanging pouchy stomach thingy pushes down on my bladder and makes me have to pee more often, and the 100+ ounces of water a day doesn't help matters, under the folds of loose skin rashes and sweat hide. My clothes have to be bigger to fit all this silly puddy... otherwise everything turns into Spanx and comfort goes out the window. I am going to have lots of plastic surgery ahead... If and when I get near goal. But until then I go around waving everything in the breeze, flopping aroung like I don't have a care in the world.

WTF.... A Life in Bullet form.

2011-07-12T23:50:00.000-07:00

Well....I have been doing well... making good choices with food and exercising at least 5 days a week. So why do I feel discouraged?

I still feel like I'm on that hateful plateau, even though the scale seemed to be heading down, It keeps bouncing back up... Maybe it's muscle from working out so much, maybe I am retaining water, maybe I am a sleep eater, but I need to feel like I am working towards something and I have fought hard to get the scale going down... and I am not liking the hanging around and a few times it looked like I am gaining.

Why don't I do what I say I'm going to do? I've been saying that I am going to get a tape measure to take my measurements so I can really see if I am losing inches even if I am not losing pounds but i still haven't done it.... I never did it, even before my surgery. I don't know why because it seems to be sabotaging my success. I WILL take my measurement this week.

My scale is definitely acting up and so is the gym's scale... I want to believe the lows and I want to not believe the highs but since I can't get the same number twice and I am all over the grid... I need to get a new scale. I should stop weighing myself like Amy W. did since I could use a little less obsessing about numbers and a little more obsessing about exercising and keeping active.

I have admitted finally to myself that I should have gotten the Gastric Bypass... I just have too much to lose for the band. I wanted to teach myself new eating habits and to be able to make good choices most of the time but even though I do... the weight's not coming off and I get very frustrated. I thought that the band would make me work hard to get the weight off but would really be helpful in keeping it off but I struggle alot more than I thought I would and I feel like I am on a diet most of the time which makes me lose hope. I feel deprived often and resent myself for letting my weight get this out of control.

I forgot the other thing I had to say here.... but I am reading Tina Fey's book Bossypants. Most of you know that Tina and I went to high school together. As I am reading it, I am doing alot of reminising and remembering old times. I did really enjoy High School unlike alot of other people did... It's weird to think that there were memories before George.... lets call it BG. Well, BG... I was beautiful, with porcelin skin, fiery redhair and black diamond eyes that sparkled when I smiled/laughed. I didn't know any of this at the time. I wish George had been there to see me in my glory days but he was sorta geeky and I probably wouldn't have given him the time of day. It's funny how time changed us for the better. I had mad curves but was not fat... even though I thought I was... Well, maybe I was a little chubby. I dream of being chubby now. I wouldn't want to go back to live through a time BG, since I now know how incredible he is... but it's fun to think about those days.

Because of being lost in Tina's book at the gym... I rode the bike for over an hour. So, Thanx Tina... for making my Bossypants a little baggier.

Goodbye Plateau?

2011-07-10T20:04:00.001-07:00

I don't wanna speak too soon but it seems like I may have broken through my plateau... I have been trying Acai Berry Chews and they are helping me with energy, appetite suppression, etc... It is working well to help me keep myself in line with my eating and my exercising. So that's good!

How's Life in The FAT Lane?

2011-07-06T14:38:00.000-07:00

I gotta say that this weight loss journey isn't always easy... In fact, it's hardly ever easy. Old habits die hard, or in my case... live forever. Just when I think i have this body working for me, instead of against me... I fall again. Fall How?

Binge.... There was a father had a girl and Bingy was her name, OH... B-I-N-G-E, B-I-N-G-E, B-I-N-G-E and Bingy was her name-O! I binge still... on healthier food but still too much. Sometimes, on Gym days I am so hungry that I could eat 3000 calories if I let myself. I still keep chocolate out of the house, and ice cream... since those melt and the band is worthless to fight against them. I know my limitations but I ignore them and think I can handle moderation now... but I can't.

Workout... I want to workout longer or 2 times a day but my body is weak and crippled still from carrying around all this extra weight. My knees are causing me alot of pain, and my hip has been acting up... I feel like I am 80 years old in body and 20 years old in mind. I still fight the urge to be a couch potato or sleep til noon... but I feel like I'm forcing myself to be more active... like I don't want to but it's an obligation. I want to WANT to be mobile always!

Eating when I'm not hungry... or waiting to eat til I'm too hungry. I want to eat just to be eating sometimes, like I miss my life as it was... I realize now that I gave up on myself for several years before I got my band. I ate what I wanted, when I wanted, and as much as I wanted... and never exercised. I had a good life, a really good life. My husband did all the housework, and cooking... and supported us financially as well. He was and is my hero. I want to do more... I want to be his hero sometimes too.

My Health... It is much better for sure, 130 pounds lighter but I still have a way to go. It was fear that brought me to the band. My sister died at 33, she was Obese, Diabetic, had High Blood Pressure, High Cholesterol, and Sleep Apnea. In 2004, I fell and destroyed both knees... In 2005, I lost my job at Disney for attendance, sometime it was hard to get out of bed, I was in pain all the time.... My weight became a real downer. After I was diagnosed with Diabetes, High Cholesterol, High Blood Pressure, Sleep Apnea... I saw myself going the way of my sister... leaving behind a gorgeous semi-young perfectly molded husband for some stupid girl to destroy... Do I sound Bitter? Well, I sorta am... But I am no longer a diabetic, my blood pressure and cholesterol are normal and my sleep apnea is milder... I feel better physically. But Mentally, I need work... big time.

The facts don't change.... Losing weight is hard work always, banded or not. It is much easier to eat 3500 extra calories and gain a pound than to burn 3500 extra calories to lose a pound... and much quicker. A Body at Rest stays at rest, A Body in motion stays in motion(Thanx Arthritis commercial). If it tastes great, you'll gain weight(Almost always a fact, and when it's not... It just makes you want to eat more crap). Trying to replace a craving with a "healthy" close enough, never works... just eat the thing you crave or you'll eat your way to it. Your support is the best thing to cure the WTFs(That's the legal term). BTW, I still have a great life... even greater now that my weight is less great.

Happy Independance Day from where It all began!

2011-07-05T01:33:00.000-07:00

It's been too long since I blogged on and on about everything....

I was so excited to be back home for the 4th of July, Here in Philly it is a big huge deal with week long festivities and I enjoyed the fireworks over the Philadelphia Museum of Art tonight with my George... We hadn't been in years, which means we convienently forgot about the huge crowds(100's of thousands), and many detours and road blocks... but we had a great view of the main stage where the ROOTS, Boyz ii Men, Sara Barielles, Earth Wind and Fire, DJ Jazzy Jeff, Michael McDonald, & Estelle... I don't feel uncomfortably patriotic here, like I did in Orlando. We bleed Red, White, and Blue!

Anyway, Yesterday was my Uncle's big BBQ/Pool Party Bash... I was jealous of the great photos on facebook every year but never able to attend since the 1000 miles was too much of a commute and Disney is very busy for all holidays(In case you forgot George and I both worked there at one point or another while we lived in Florida)... It was a great time at my Uncle's, Great food(too much), great family bonding, great friends... I was reminded of how glad I am to be home with my Kin while munching on Crabcakes delivered poolside... Yum!

Today, we walked to the end of the driveway of our house and sat in lawn chairs watching the local parade go by... Picture old times with kids on the bikes decorated with streamers, garland, and balloons drowning in red white and blue and flags in every hand... The fire depts, antique cars, dancers, bands, drum corps, all went by as we sat in our driveway... I felt nostalgic and cherished every moment with our dog by my feet all dressed in his most patriotic outfit(Yes, my Dog likes to dress up... Don't judge!)

I went to the gym 4 times last week but since I made a deal with Jen to go 5 days a week... that's what this week holds. Today I walked alot but the gym was closed for the holiday so a No Go there but I will go tomorrow, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday... and then start again.

I read one of Amy W.'s posts today about the dangers of comparing our bodies.... and It got me thinking of myself.... I spent too long staring at this young girl at tonight's festival Downtown... She was gorgeous and I was jealous of her awesome body. I know that I will never have a perfect body and I got this band to better my health or even save my life so I shouldn't care but I do realize that the tight bods I most envy are much much younger than mine... I think I feel resentful for missing alot of my youth by being on a diet and not liking my body. I always thought I was fat... even before I actually was. I want to relive those days and know what I know now... Now that would be interesting! but I remember that I was 22 when I met my George and even though I had alot of fun before him, my Forever started the day we met. If I had been different, happier with myself, realized how gorgeous I was... maybe I wouldn't have given him the time of day and ended up with a huge Jerk(My gorgeous Husband for those of you who haven't met him is a bit of a geek, even though he's drop dead gorgeous, and he thinks I am the only one who thinks he's good looking, I am blessed) ... So, I have no regrets!

Birthday Blues... and Me.

2011-06-24T12:19:00.000-07:00

Well, yesterday was my first birthday since moving back home and It was almost uneventful. I did get to spend time with my fiesty niece and my sweet angel nephews though... which was a blessing. Becoming 42, not so much. I have been feeling middle-aged lately, not emotionally... but physically. My knees and hip have been hurting alot lately, but I want to keep active or they will be stiff too.

Anyway, I guess I should tell you that your body gets used to your new weight, if you stay there too long... so I need to get this train moving towards my goal at a faster pace. I know I've said that it's not a sprint, it's a marathon but It's also not supposed to be treading water or waiting for a bus. I feel tired, I feel bored... I need my exercise to get me moving and shake off these cobwebs on my joints.

As for my eating, It could be better, but it's not bad... It will be better. I have been keeping my fiber up but my protein has been slipping... from around 95-110 grams a day to 76-85 grams a day... which is the low end of where I need to be. I checked my BMR(Basal Metabolic Rate) which is the rate that your body burns calories in a resting state... or in case you stayed in bed all day... LOL. It's 2343.2 supposively... which even if I am slightly off with my calorie count... and get more active than the bedridden... which means I should be losing like 2 pounds a week or so. And... I'm not. So unless I am a sleep eater, something is wrong with that number.

I want to thank you all for your support and wonderful birthday messages on facebook. I know I am much healthier at age 42 than I was at 41, or 40 or 39... etc. I booked my flight to Chicago this week and I am thrilled that I got a great rate and am able to go and be with my BOOBS. Your support has been an incredible blessing to me!

BOOBS alert... I need a room or a couch for Sunday night?

2011-06-21T22:14:00.000-07:00

Hey Folks....
I was wondering if any of you BOOBS 2.0 folks are staying at the hotel til monday? The airfare for sunday is very high so I need to stay til monday... so if anyone's staying over an extra day or lives near there and has an extra couch available... Pretty Please! I can't afford the whole room rate myself... Give me any tips or thoughts you may have... I appreciate it.

Just a bunch of stuff and things...

2011-06-21T01:49:00.000-07:00

So I let like 8 days go by since my last post... I guess I'm keeping busier up here with all my family and friend catchups.... I am mostly doing ok with food choices and need to get back into my routine with my water intake and remembering my vitamins. I am supposed to be drinking like 128 ounces of water a day but I thought I was doing well at 100. It's 8 glasses of water for normal folks and 1 more glass of water for every 25 pounds you want to lose. That's alot of water... I am already peeing every 15-20 minutes... well, maybe 1/2 hour or so.

I am loving being so close to my nephews and have been spending loads of time with them... which keeps me active but I need to decide which gym is for me. There were 2 more I wanted to tour and check out and I can make my choice. Priorities are within 5 miles of home, weights, group classes, my cardio machines I like, pool, and everything else is a bonus... I may have to consider price too since my new insurance won't pay for the membership like my old one did.

I am worried about whether I can afford to go to Chicago this year... My husband says he doesn't want me to miss out since I enjoyed myself so much last year and met so many great new friends... but money is really tight and the flight is going to cost me like $400, plus my part of our room and other expenses. I don't want to decide at the last minute since my roommates could find someone to replace me if I gave them enough time.

My birthday is this Thursday and I am excited about spending the first birthday at home with my family and friends. My nephew Chase (3 years old) told me he's gonna make me a cake... I asked him what kind and he said... Van-Nell-Ya! Which is coincidentally his favorite! I can't wait to see his work! I wonder if he'll get fancy with fondant... or Spun sugar... I am beginning to think I watch too much Food Network.

I wonder.... Random things.

2011-06-13T14:37:00.000-07:00

I wonder....

If the lack on comments on my blog lately is Lack of interest, lack of working Blogger, lack of time, or maybe I should mind my own beeswax and stop trying to control your internet life...

If my body will ever be "Skinny" to my mind?

If chocolate is heaven sent or the devil's way to control me?

If my weight loss will rev up again or is slow and non-existant the new thing for me?

If life is like a box of chocolates?

If my metabolism will ever be fast? I would love the superpower of the Mother on Ordinary Family... She had a superspeedy Metabolism and had to shove food down her throat non-stop.

If I will ever not dream of shoving food down my throat without weight gain?

If I will ever be able to say like some of you... My brain is fixed, I don't want to eat when I'm not hungry.

If the Rain in Spain stays mainly on the Plain?

If not enough will ever be too much?

If my nephews could get any more adorable? The answer is NO.... They couldn't, but then they do...

If these gorgeous and thin women understand that when they call themselves FAT it's uber-annoying?

If I will ever find a gym that I love as much as my old one?

If anyone will ever invent a chocolate that enhances weight loss... except Ex-lax?

If we will ever see the end of this money drought?

If I will reach my goal by next fall, like I planned? At least my first goal? It seems more difficult now, since I have re-introduced a few carbs into my meal plan... I mean Fall of 2012, just so you know I'm not completely bonkers.

If I should find a new therapist, now that I am back in the land of cheesesteaks and soft pretzels? I would like to try one of those therapists that specializes in food addiction...

If I should get a cheesesteak or soft pretzel to celebrate finishing this list?

Be Careful what you wish for... You might get it!

2011-06-09T19:21:00.000-07:00

I wished....

I wished that pasta tasted like feet, and It sorta does now... How did that happen? I used to eat pasta like 3 or 4 times a week, and now I still try a little like once a month... and I don't enjoy it but I forget that by next month's attempt. I could go for some cheese ravoli.

I wished that I would lose weight fast, and I sorta did... Now my less that graceful movements are followed by waves of skin and loose fat trying to escape... I wish it would.

I wished that I would be more active and have more mobility... and I sorta am... Now my husband expects me to contribute more with housework, etc... I totally loved him doing everything, I could daydream that I had a chef, maid, and butler... He still does more around the house than all my friends' husbands combined... Silver lining.

I wished that I get through stress and sorrow without drowning them in chocolate, ice cream, and doughnuts... and I still can't completely, but when I do... The sense of accomplishment doesn't taste as good, as I hoped it would. I wish it was dipped in chocolate.

I wished that people would look past my fat and see how beautiful I am inside and out, and now I have to make an effort to put myself together, you know... makeup, hairstyles, wardrobe, primping, hair removal... It takes some effort to be naturally gorgeous like me.

I wished that I could save some money by eating less, and I guess I should warn you that it's more expensive to eat healthier... No matter how little you eat, hence a $.99 fast food burger is cheaper than a chobani greek yogurt, unless you hit a good sale.

I wished that not having to shop for the largest sized clothes would save a few bucks, and it seems that the smaller I get, the more clothes I want to own... All hail the Sisterhood of the travelling pants.

I wished that being able to have more selection of clothes would mean that I would give up the Fat Girl obsession with accessories, you know purses, jewelry, etc... but it seems like I actually want it all... Hats, Purses, shoes, jewelry, and I have my eye on a couple scarves.

I wished that I could lose my chocolate obsession in one of the 130 pounds I've left behind, that wish hasn't been granted yet, unfortunately.

I wished that I would find lots of support and understanding on this journey, and I have... right here on my Banded Blogosphere... I love you all, and no matter how much weight I lose on this road, I am glad a picked up a few lightweights like you along the way.

Enema... A Love Story.(Graphic for Draz...LOL)

2011-06-08T00:58:00.000-07:00

Well, There's a first time for everything...

I have had various bathroom issues for the first time post-band, including constipation. Which I never experienced pre-band and always thought... so you aren't poopin'. What's the biggie?

I have learned over these last 15 months what the biggie is.... Big Time! I started taking a stool softener daily once I was banded and after a while, mistakenly didn't think I needed it. I started getting more fiber and seemed pretty regular.... but once in a while, if I ran out of my fiber bars, fiber one cereal(like granola in my greek yogurt), etc. Even for one day, and It is on....

What is ON? A war between my Body and My waste.... Gas pains, and constipation... lead to a horrifying experience within my bottom... like giving birth to a porcupine. I give up after several excruciating contractions... and suffer in silence. It's kinda like PMS, except instead of something draining out of your body, It's something fighting to get out, like that Alien in that Guy's stomach.

Well, This weekend while I was at my brother's house... it started rearing it's ugly head... Literally. I was grumpy on the inside but Joyful on the outside since my nephews are the sun and the moon to me. But I bided my time between attempts to evacuate, you know how it is when someone outstays their welcome... Well, it's like that only more intense, and usually you don't get dramatic enough to wish for death when your in-laws come to visit.

Late last night I returned home to George and my fluffy Son... I felt like crap, and went right to bed after several more tortureous evacuation attempts and a visit to the CVS. I am laying in weird positions on my bed inserting a long pointy hard thing in my hole, but enough about that... let's get back to the Enema. Insert Uncomfortable giggle here.... There's something special about your first time, and this was no different. I was nervous and uncomfortable, and hoping for a quick painless in and out.... and there I was experiencing my first butt douche. Where will my body draw the line?

Fast forward... I feel much better. The humiliation and discomfort is BEHIND me... My behind is out of digestive distress and Draz has long ago passed out from Overshare Distress.

PS... You may not want to Google Enema images... especially you Draz!

Mean Girls.... and Me.

2011-06-03T01:15:00.000-07:00

Well, Life can be overly dramatic... and since I'm not in High School anymore so I am so not into the drama these days. I sometimes wish the unfriending process was as easy in real life as it is on facebook. Edit Friends.... Delete. Well, not so much. I lost a friend this week... A girl I have known for over 25 years... Actually, her brother was my best friend for 25 years, he was the best man in our wedding 16 years ago, and lived with me and George before we moved to Florida.

I was not close to his sister, although I met her at the same time that I met him. For months now he's struggled with what I think is a drug problem. So she and I started talking more on the phone, facebook, and texting back and forth, sort of bonding over our worry for him until I turned from worried to annoyed to angry. Since she is his Sister... she has no choice but to eventually forgive him when he comes around, if he ever does.

I, on the other hand, wanted to try out a new peaceful, less-dramatic existence... I am enjoying a simplier life with my George, and pretty thrilled with my new less stressful situation. I am willing to work through things when there's something to work through but for now... It's a back burner issue. I need to concentrate on things that can be worked through with people who are actively trying to enhance their lives and not drag me into a tornado of trouble.

We all know the drama that makes up our High school experience... not as much fun as I remembered. And as you all know, I went to high school with Tina Fey, so Mean Girls was written based on our high school's drama...And here I am getting called names by text and facebook, at 41 by a real life Mean Girl, a cyber bully if you will.

Back to this girl, my BFF's sister... I was never a fan, she's very self-absorbed and conversations are more like a therapy sesson than a chatfest. I mean she talks about herself and her issues... and it is not a back and forth thing. I sorta would like to talk about me a little bit... although her drama is more interesting than my vanilla happy marriage, and adoration of my nephews. I was concerned when a catch up chat every couple months turned into every week and then every day... and last weekend while I was enjoying a family BBQ/Pool party, she called like 5 times... while I was in the pool with my nephews. What? Are you serious, Maria? Why... I sure am, overly concerned follower...

Then I went back to my brother's house to stay the night so we could spend more time with my nephews and enjoy another BBQ.... and she called a couple more times, late at night with my nephews sleeping. I had texted her a couple times to say that I was with family and would call her back as soon as I could... I asked her was anything wrong? Is it an emergency? No... Are you frickin' kiddin' me?

I am all about the Texting... I text like a high school kid in study hall. It's all about the multi-tasking. I like watching TV while texting, Reading and texting, making dinner and texting, texting while on the computer... even TWP(Texting while peeing). I don't text and drive so that's the only time I will call instead. Anyway, I wasn't pleased with the 10 calls in a day and a half, at all.

Long story short...(Too Late) We are no longer friends. One of my opinions(Blaming Drugs for everything you do and say is no excuse)... Believe me, It explains alot, but excuses nothing. I am honest to a fault and I have been trying the lie by omission thing, but people don't seem to like me refusing to answer questions and changing the subject.

The moral of the Story.... Don't ask a question if you don't want the answer! *Maria* Keeping it REAL since 1969.

The Road thru CandyLand in a Sticky one...

2011-05-28T23:08:00.000-07:00

I've been having alot of "THOSE" days.... You Know, My husband loves me the way I am... I am healthier than I was last year... I feel much better, so I can endulge my other loves... Cake, Chocolate, Ice Cream, and Cookies...

My weight's been slowing down to meet me... I mean to say, After I lost 120 pounds in a year and even a little before that... I felt great like I weighed 150 pounds, was athletic and could do anything.... Until I saw a mirror. Realization set in and reminded me how very far I have to go and I felt sorry for myself. If I was just 300 pounds like most of my Blog Boobs when I started this journey I'd be circling the block looking for a parking place now... Instead of losing another couple hundred pounds... WTF Did I do to myself? How could I let this happen? Why did this happen to me? Pity Party Table for 1....

I have to reset myself: Both brain and body to think that I am just starting out and I can do this.... You will not defeat me! The Evil Chocolatier! The Ice Creamer, The Cookie Monster, or even The Cake Boss! Why do Villains seem so much worse with "The" in front of their name?

I am in new uncharted territory... I mean, I've never been this far through Candyland without getting stuck with a gumdrop up my butt or molasses on my shoes.... I am in my 2nd consecutive year of mostly losing weight and even when not losing weight... Not gaining it back? Can this be my life now? Am I becoming "normal"? You know the normal I mean, That girl who will struggle with a few extra pounds but that's all. Bare in mind, a few extra pounds to me, could end up being 100... but Who cares!

I can make mostly good choices, I can exercise pretty regularly, I can eat in moderation, even though I may not always choose to do these things.... Most importantly, I can be the Better Me! The one I've dreamed about but not quite got to know... I can feel her inside me bubbling up to the surface. She looks in the mirror and likes what she sees, even when I nit-pick.... She laughs when she falls and gets up and skip, even when I sit on the ground and feel sorry for myself... She rolls her eyes when I complain about my loose skin melting all over me, and makes me smile when I feel my ribs through my Thinner skin... She is planning her coming out party while I am pushing her back in with self-sabotage. But she is stronger than me, alot of the time, and is getting stronger everyday. She is the girl I love to hate.... but she is the girl who hates to love me.

I can't keep my mouth shut... oh wait!

2011-05-26T22:32:00.000-07:00

Well, I have read of some bloggers having trouble with blogger.... and I am one of them. Those of you who've met me know that I have alot to say... some welcome, some... not so much. It seems Blogger has decided that none of what I have to say is worth reading... so I haven't been able to comment on alot of blog posts.... and I really want to tell you how well you're doing, encourage you, Inspire you, make you laugh, make you feel beautiful, and special... but alas... Blogger thinks I talk to much! So I'll consider myself censored.... for now. Can one of you techno suavy folk find out why they hate me so??? I want to get back on my soapbox... soon.

Totally Random Thursday....well, Friday?

2011-05-19T14:44:00.001-07:00

Well, I have been scatterbrained lately, so....

Why don't I like Blueberries? I like every other berry, in fact I love raspberries, strawberries, blackberries, alot... But not Blueberries. Not even in pie! It's just weird!

I think that EVERY GIRL needs a Gay.... They're good for your self-esteem, and nobody gives good drama like a Queen. I have always attracted them like an Ethel Merman Vs. Liza Minnelli singoff... but I can't imagine my life without getting my Gay on from time to time. BTW, I have my Gay Boyfriend back now that I'm back in Philly... and He says that I don't put the Fag in Hag, I put the Dream in Queen... Why does that make me smile?

I am sick today... and we are going to the Phillies game, which takes a trolley, and 2 subways. Hopefully, Public Transportation and sitting in the rain at a baseball game will cure me.

Yesterday was my youngest nephew Blake's 1st birthday... We are having his party this sunday. I am so excited to be here to celebrate with my family.

Sandy Lee from The Weight Loss Roller Coaster is Visiting Barbara From My Body, my Band, My Rant, and I am definitely horning in on their fun... I met Sandy in Chicago and look forward to spending more time with her. I love Barb, I am so glad to be close in distance to her now. We will get to have our cake and eat it too... There will be cake won't there?

The movie Soul Surfer was so inspiring... It makes me think, If that one armed shark victim can surf professionally, why can't I beat the Chocolatier? Although, If I only had one arm, I couldn't shovel it in quite as fast and may tire out before a sugar coma. BTW, AnnaSophia Robb may amazing as Bethany Hamiliton, Helen Hunt & Dennis Quaid were incredible as her parents, Carrie Underwood was great too... I heard alot of people thinking it's offensive that she credits alot of her overcoming adversity and success on her faith in Jesus... How is that offensive? It is a true story... If she credited her Mother or Father, it wouldn't be offensive, would it? No one should be offended by what helps someone else get through trials and tribulation. I find that offensive.

Ok, Now I've been on my soapbox, told you what I'm looking forward to, whined about my sickness, and lack of love for Blueberries... Have a great weekend everyone!

Happy Birthday Baby Blake! You are the Sunshine of my life.... literally! I adore you! XOXO

Philly is supposed to be home to Soul, not the Blues.

2011-05-17T00:20:00.000-07:00

Well, I don't have much to say.... which is why I haven't been blogging but I guess I could tell you a few things that have been bothering me.

I have been hungry alot lately... I am not sure why, but I am pretty sure I need a fill, big time.

I thought I was doing ok since I have been eating like crap and not gaining weight... but I am on this journey to lose, not maintain.

I have PBed once and a while but I haven't been as careful: eating too fast, and not chewing enough.

I am feeling sorta depressed lately... since my George is struggling to find a job and we are almost completely out of savings, I feel like he will grow to resent me because I begged for this move. I know it has only been a few weeks and maybe we could have been more careful with our spending but It seemed like he had a job lined up so I figured that more money would be heading our way soon. Hopefully, that job or another will turn up soon, because there is nothing a breadwinner hates more than having his or her spouse support them.

Bread is so much better up here... and my band disagrees with my findings... and insists that I stop experimenting with it.

I ate a Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwich on white bread today, I haven't had white bread in years and it transported me mentally to my childhood. It was Yum! but I know it wasn't a good choice. Why do things from our childhoods always taste better in their original form? Grilled cheese tastes good on white bread too... I need to get over my current bread obsession.

75% off Easter Candy railroaded me... Literally.

My nephews are the sunshine of my life, which is good since I left the Sunshine State for them.

Rahshell sent me some awesome Capris that I hope my fat ass fits in them by summer(At this rate, maybe not?)... I love Rahshell... If you don't follow her blog: Check it out... Band'it for my babies

I am not drinking anything near my regular water intake, at first I didn't worry since It's very high and I wouldn't miss a few ounces but now it's way too low... so I am counting bottles tomorrow for sure.

I haven't been to the gym since I got here... WTF? I know, I have been distracted but I have been here for several weeks.

I love ON DEMAND... It is one of my new drugs, I had Directv in Florida so no ON DEMAND but I am all over it up here... and I watch WAY too much TV.

My youngest nephew Blake will be one in 2 days... I can't believe it but It stings so much less since I see him every week at least once, and I will be at his party next weekend. Bittersweet, No?

Maybe It is a good time to revisit... ATKINS, but I'm thinking about it.

I tried some Capri Leggings the other day... not a total success but I may get some full length ones.

I have been reading all your blogs but not commenting as much as I should... I will try harder.

This week, I am going to get to the gym, try to limit my bad food choices as much as possible, and blog at least twice. I am also going to make sure I am getting at least 64 ounces of water a day... I know these sound like wimpy goals but BABY STEPS... People, Baby Steps!

To the Lady at Giant....

2011-05-10T17:02:00.000-07:00

To the Nice, Helpful Lady at the Giant,

You were so sweet to suggest the Lemon Chobani... It was thoughtful to help me mix it up with a new flavor and all, but you have horrible taste and I hate you! Next time, Butt out!

Yours truly,
Stickin' with Raspberry

**********Ps. Yes I am a bitch, No I don't know this woman and she doesn't read my blog...LOL

I'm getting old.... but my skin is flawless!

2011-05-07T11:17:00.000-07:00

Turns out.... I'm getting old. Here are the facts:

BonJovi was a great concert but I wore earplugs.... cauz it was so damn loud!

The long drive to Long Island made me crotchity, cranky, grouchy...

I find myself complaining about all these damn stairs... while climbing them.

I'm enjoying all the Early Bird specials at the Diners...

I was so annoyed by that long drive to LI, that I told my husband I looked forward to when he was dead so I could dance on his grave in a red dress... Crazy, because we're going to be cremated.

I found myself surrounded by gray hairs at a dinner theatre in Delaware, gasping at The Full Monty...

I fell asleep briefly on the subway... the other day.

I complain at how high the prices are.... everywhere.

Gas Prices when I was young weren't even a dollar a gallon...

At the Church's flea market, clothes were $2 for whatever you could fit in a supermarket paper bag... and I really stuffed that thing like mad.

I'm a hat person again... I am looking for a red one, maybe I'll join the red hat society.

What's with these youngsters with their pants falling down, somehow that's the style that passes the test of time...

I get aggravated at these crazy drivers and how fast and furious they drive... even though I am one of them.

I am thinking of buying some reading glasses at walgreens, since I borrowed a pair to read some small print, and they were so helpful!

I watch alot of the Food Network.... a whole lot.

These days, I really appreciate a good bowel movement...

These new fangled gadgets mesmorize me...

I love wigs... (usually for Halloween or role playing but that's besides the point...)

Fiber is incredibly important in your diet... (See above for one of the reasons)

I want to eat everything I shouldn't... especially Sweets.(Maybe always... but So What!)

I am still more likely to chose my granny panties than their sexy counterparts...(They're just comfier...)

I make up words like Comfier...

I love when Ruby combines words for dramatic effect... I am humidified(humiliated and mortified), I am Hacky(Happy and Wacky), etc...

I like to shock folks with unneccessary use of the F word...

There's no such thing as unneccessary use of the F word(Come on, I'm from Philly... We made up a bunch of other words to replace the F Word in times of restrait or overuse)

I have to eat salty right after sweet or... sweet right after salty.

I am starting to agree with the Northeast vision of starches are vegetables too...

I really like cake... did I mention that?

I go on and on with long lists of thoughts.... and tell the same story over and over again...

Why am I thinking about Cake?

My nephews are the Apple of my eye...

My feet are cold....

I'm going to go get some cake.

BTW, My skin is amazing up here, I thought my age was causing dryness and blotchiness, but I guess Florida's climate is what did the damage.... and now It's flawless like a princess baby soaking in Rose oil... Or should that be baby princess! Who cares, I'm beautiful!

Scale Calibration.... and other Excuses.

2011-05-04T21:40:00.000-07:00

My scale is like a slot machine these days.... I am not sure that the move was the best thing for it... It may need calibration, or my Ass needs major calibration but I am thinking both need it. I am more active up here but seem to be too busy to get to the gym. I need to calibrate my mind back into weight loss mode, since it seems to be slipping from maintenance mode to gain mode.

Anyway, I won't stop attempting to eat soft pretzels... no matter how many times I get stuck. I can't eat them anymore.... I will stick to a small bite or pretzel nuggets. I have always loved Soft pretzels, and being a Philly Girl makes it hard to resist. I don't even like them that much anymore but the memories of how much I loved them... makes me still want them, even after several stuck incidents. Why isn't that enough to stop me from thinking this time will be different? I can get nuggets and eat a couple, or I can get a mini pretzel and eat most of it... but the regular ones are always hot and fresh.... so tempting. I can help but think that I will never beat this addiction, not completely.

I have enjoyed getting caught up with my family and several close friends, still unpacking and getting settled.... and procrastinating finding a gym, and deciding on new insurance. It is important that I get these things done.... but the days are flying by and I am still waiting for the urge to get my ducks in a row. I did enjoy the Support Group I went to at the University of Pennsylvania, but I need to find a new surgeon and that would be a great place to start.

One of the reasons that I fattened up in Florida is pretty simple... Lack of stairs. I climb several flights of stairs several times a day now and It has been wearing on my knees which has made me make a few bad decisions, like instead of climbing down 2 flights of stairs to get a healthy snack, just munch on some puffcorn or chocolate... I got to get control of these kinds of choices.

Banded Bullets.... and other crapola.

2011-04-29T23:22:00.000-07:00

Well, I was thinking about some things that have changed since I was banded... while I was at a my first Philly Support Group with an Renewed high school friend....

I feel less stressed about losing weight... I just take it as it comes and week it when it doesn't.

I eat more fish, I love it actually... but I wasn't crazy about fish pre-band.

I fart alot more, much more... I guess it's my "healthier" diet, but they usually don't smell much so I just accept it and hide in a corner now and then.

I crave things that I never really liked before... like French toast and mashed potatoes... Weird, right?

I think my food decisions through more... I count calories, carbs, and fat but my life doesn't revolve around it, I just like being informed.

I really enjoy working out at the gym... It gives me a feeling of accomplishment.

I wear my war wounds with pride but a little annoyance... I have elephant knees, a floppy belly, bat wings, and sagging parts galore, It reminds me of alot of hard work and good choices... but it also reminds me that I still have far to go...

Fiber is important to me... really important.

I have a vase with a little pebble/rock for every pound I've lost... I have lots more rocks to go in... when it's time. It's really beautiful, I saw the idea on RUBY, and I decided that It was something I wanted to do as well.

I watch HEAVY, RUBY, and many other Weight Loss survivor stories... they inspire me.

Sometimes the mirror is more honest with me than other times.

I am working on a scrapbook about my weight loss journey... called 1 vs 300.

My weight can fluctuate up to 10 pounds in a day.

Since I have been back home to Philly, I have eaten cake, candy, carbs in abundance, I haven't started back at the gym... and I haven't gained a pound and maybe even lost a little... because of 2 flights of stairs to my little loft... and alot more walking.

I love reading your blogs and feel like I am part of your daily grind... and love having you in my daily grind.

I am so happy to be home... and I feel like singing!

Happy Keaster to You!

2011-04-24T08:14:00.000-07:00

I'm tempted to do bullets again, since I am the random thought queen but I will stick to basics. First and Foremost... Happy Easter! to those of you who are praising our Lord and Savior for taking our place on that cross, and also to those of you who can appreciate a day dedicated to candy and a big juicy ham. I am a Sinner...Hello Gluttony and Fornication, so I can praise Jesus with a mouthful of black jellybeans and marshmallow peeps. The best thing about today is that it's the first Easter Sunday when I will be with my family, in over a decade. I am truly blessed!

Anyway, I have come to a conclusion... The reason I fattened up in Florida was more than just my injury and lack of mobility... It was also a lack of stairs. Stairs are few and far between in Florida. Most houses are ranchers and elevators are wherever else. Well, when I went on my last cruise Jacquie told me that I should choose the stairs on the ship over the elevators... I thought, There are stairs on the ship? ... but I did notice the giant staircases next to all elevators and I chose them. It felt good. Well, Here in PA... Stairs are everywhere and sometimes, it's stairs or nothing. I was thinking, I didn't eat more, or less healthy once I moved down to Florida but I kept gaining and gaining. Now, I am jumping on and off the bus, train, EL, Subway... whatever, since Gas is so pricey and so is parking. I walk more, for need, not exercise and there are 2 flights of stairs up to my SoHo loft.(I am not living in SoHo, but it's my attic's style...LOL). I am more active, without adding in my gym time. So that could make a difference in my success! Hopefully!

I am getting back to the gym tomorrow. I haven't been able to go in about a week, since we were moving and all, but lifting heavy boxes and furniture could be my workout. I am going to check out a couple gyms, I need to find one that I really feel comfy at like my Y, in O-Town. Send good thoughts my way, the more comfortable I feel at my gym, the more I will go.

I am going to the University of Pennsylvania for a Bariatric support group on Wednesday too. A friend from high school is serious about getting a band and she's going so I decided to join her... It is band specific. Hey, I need support too, don't I ?

Last night, we went to the James Blunt Concert at the Tower theatre... It really brought back my youth... I went there for concerts all the time as a teenager, One of my friends worked there with security so he would get us in or get us a chance to meet the artists. Adam Ant touched my hand from stage once there... but I have washed it since, even though I claimed I never would. Anyway, I hadn't been there in like 12 years since we went to see the Kids in the Hall Live... and It was amazing. The theater hasn't changed much, It is classic and historic so a little dingy and worn but then so am I. We took the train there and we were there quick and home quick. Gotta love public transportation!

Easter comes but once a year... Thank Goodness!

2011-04-22T16:35:00.000-07:00

Black Beans have alot of Protein, Right?

Bullets over Philly!

2011-04-21T21:43:00.000-07:00

Hey, these are my weekly or sometimes weakly bullets....

I love black jellybeans, they taste like licorice.

Moving still sucks, but the unpacking part isn't as bad as the packing part.

I still feel dirty, I shower and shower and can't get the truck dirt feeling off me.

My mom's new apartment is huge... and she seems happy.

I am going to see James Blunt with George on Saturday, taking a break from settling in...

My Uncle and his wife are doing the family Easter Sunday this year... so there will be food, and lots of it.

I haven't seen my nephews yet but I love that they are a little over 1/2 an hour driving away instead of a little over 1/2 a day's driving away.... and I will see them on Easter.

I have been eating less than usual since I got here, I think I am just distracted from my routine.

Go Flyers!

I'm still thinking about black jellybeans... Yum!

I don't know where all this crap is going to find a home...

I really need to go to Walmart and get some of my regular foods in the house... so I can get back on track.

Is it surprising to you that I haven't unpacked my scale yet?

My niece is getting really skinny... I hope she sees how beautiful she is...

Send me all your black jellybeans!

It was really scary-funny to watch my Father-in-law chase my fridge down the ramp of the truck... screaming... HEY!

I need to go to the movies, I haven't been in weeks.

It's kinda chilly here, I feel like an idiot wearing sweatshirts and jackets while the natives walk around in shorts and flip flops. I hope I will get my native groove back soon!

When I see people wearing my teams' gear, I still want to say Go Phils, Go Eagles, Go Flyers... and up here, everyone is wearing their gear...

I certainly hope those black beans are in the mail....

Have a Happy Healthy Easter everyone! Watch out for that Food Pusher... Easter Bunny!

I am alive and well... well, sort of!

2011-04-20T18:32:00.000-07:00

Anyway, This move has been overwhelming. We are downsizing... from a 4 bedroom home to a attic in my In-law's home. I am thrilled to be back in Philly where we grew up, met, and fell in love. We can watch our nephews grow up and get back strongly on our feet, travel more and continue my quest to get healthy and maybe a little bit Fit.

Road trips... are not great for good food choices. I think I may have eaten more calories in 2 days than in all the full weeks since my surgery. But today is my first full day in the Mainline... and I have eaten good and even though I feel weak and worn out got a good workout with unloading the truck and walking. Plus all that driving burns loads of calories too, but since my scale isn't unpacked, I have no idea where I am with that.

I look forward to getting back into my workout schedule... I have to decide on a new gym and find my groove.... Philly Soul Style. I am going to my first Support Group at the University of Pennsylvania on the 27th. A friend of mine from high school is considering having a band installed so I told her I 'd love to join her for the support group. I need to find a new surgeon and UoP is top notch for Bariatrics.

When I look at all this stuff around me, I have a fear that I didn't let go of enough, I wanted to simplify my life and I still have a ton of crap. I think once I decorate and get things in their bookshelves, etc... I may take some more to Goodwill, I am determined to live more simply. I may also give my Mom more things to decorate her new apt.

I just wanted to check in with you all. I will post more later, when I get my mind back... It's out to lunch these days.

Moving... A trial of Hell on Earth.

2011-04-15T23:25:00.000-07:00

As you know, We are moving back home this weekend... I am very excited to be near my family and friends... especially my sweet nephews. That being said.... I am losing my mind and breaking my back with this actual moving process.

I should tell you that I had become quite the Lady of Leisure in my years of disability, and now that I am more able-bodied, I am more involved in the hard work and stress. My George is the best husband that any Girl could dream of... He has taken such good care of me for the last 20 years and made my disability, a little less debilitating. We have been loading the truck for the last 36 hours with breaks for sleeping and eating but not much else. It is like a puzzle trying to maneuver all our things to fit them in this giant box. I look forward to starting the drive.... Which I never thought I'd say...

The reason why I never thought I'd say that I was looking forward to the drive is that this truck is huge... Like a 18 wheeler or semi. That's only a slight exaggeration, I assure you. I was nervous just driving it back to our house to start loading... and it's been sitting in the driveway, jetting out slightly into the street since we picked it up on Thursday...

Well, I just wanted to take a moment to share my hellish weekend with you... 2 1/2 days packing and loading.... and 2 days driving. Hopefully, on Tuesday, I will be able to just look around at the boxes and totes and say Eff it... I am going to get a cheesesteak.

Eating out... DiZneDiVa style!

2011-04-10T19:04:00.000-07:00

Well, I eat out alot.... and since Carmen mentioned about eating out, I wanted to jump in... My favorites:

Texas Roadhouse-Steakhouse... I can eat steak without a problem, some bandsters can't, That said. I like fried food... Quote me, Fried is only one letter from friend. My hubby and I share the fried pickles. Pickles are no to low calories and with the oil and breading, the whole basket is like 174 calories, and none of us could eat the whole basket. They are yummy with a little ranch or bistro sauce... I only tip the pickle in to use as little sauce as possible. I feel like I've been bad so I always make good choices with my entree. I usually order off the kid's menu, I get the Lil Dino steak bites which is 4 ounces of steak, cooked medium rare. I can't eat steak cooked more than that which is ok with me since I like it like that. I get broccoli for my one side. I am trying to cut back on red-meat... so I will order the kids' chicken fingers too, and I ask for them grilled instead of breaded and fried with broccoli. They will make it grilled by request. It doesn't hurt to ask, so ask... if you want. I will eat a few peanuts but i try to limit that, since they're like chips to me.

Olive Garden- I used to love OG but post-band, not so much. I don't really eat pasta or bread anymore and the entrees that are high protein low carb are too expensive for me since I eat out alot, I do it on a budget. I order off the kids' menu alot... I get grilled chicken, it comes with broccoli and a little bit of pasta. i don't eat the breadsticks and I may have a little salad or soup... depends.

Red Lobster- I love Red Lobster alot Post-band... I am a huge Fish girl, I love all Whitefish but my favorites are flounder, tilapia, pollock, cod, mahi mahi... Well, at Red Lobster, I love the Wood-Fired Grilled Tilapia... It is lick your plate good! I get it with broccoli, and a side of Remoulade sauce. I love the cheddar bay biscuits so once in a while I will have a bite... but most times, I don't.

Buffets- I like Golden Corral and other places that are similar. Buffets are not easy but can be fun since variety is the spice of life. Bandsters get either a child's price or the senior's price... Ask, it will save a couple bucks since we can't eat much of the ALL YOU CAN EAT.... I look over the proteins to decide what I feel like. I usually will get a little broiled fish, some baked chicken, or turkey... I can have a little of each. I get broccoli, green beans, or califlower... or a little of each. i like to try new things, so I can decide what I like. I crave mashed potatoes since my surgery, so I will get a spoonful sometimes but not always. I can get a little salad if I feel like it, or soup. I can have a little dessert too, without eating a whole dessert. And they have several sugar free options to cut carbs. It surprises me sometimes, to not get dessert when it is freely available. but most of the time, I don't have room. Sweet tomatoes is a great buffet which is mainly salad, veggie based. I pay the child's price there and enjoy salads with meat like chicken or turkey. I pick the meaty spoonfuls, and soups with meat in them. Their soups are meaty, for sure. I love it there.

Fast food- Chick Fila is one of my favorites, luckily their "Fried" chicken is actually healthy. I order a 4 or 6 count nugget... which they have, even though they're not on the menu. Except the kids' menu. I don't get fries, if I get a kids' meal. I will get a salad instead of fries and a bottled water instead of soda. Pollo Tropical is a great choice. I get the kids' meal with grilled chicken strips, and I get salad as my side, it comes with yummy animal crackers... I try not to eat them but usually do...LOL KFC- Grilled Chicken, usually boneless, it is delicious.

Making good decisions allows you to eat anywhere, and making mostly good choices allows you to make a few bad ones... without the guilt and deprivation of diets.

FAT is a state of mind... and apparently the state of my behind.

2011-04-08T23:19:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, My George and I went to Universal Theme Parks in Orlando and I had a day full of NSFs... That's Non-Scale Failures, Leave it to me to have to come up with that term. I was thinking my new lean sleek more athletic bod would allow me to fit on some of the rides that I haven't been able to ride in the past... I was wrong. My new Lean Sleep More Athletic bod is still too thick and flabby to ride 3 of the rides I was hoping for and a 4th I was too fed-up to attempt. Universal Studios is not a fat friendly park, they never have been and I knew this but it was still difficult to be unable to ride 1/2 the rides I wanted. Thank Goodness for Disney and their Fat-Friendly ways... I did love seeing the new Harry Potter area and i rode the Simpsons, Men In Black and Spiderman... all of which I had been on before so I knew I could fit but I was disappointed about 3 others, The Mummy, Harry Potter's ride, and The HULK... which kept me from even attempting Rip Ride Rocket... or whatever it's called. I am talking about the humiliating outside trial seats of course... I wish I hadn't tried to ride any of them... I felt.... DEFEATED! I know what you're going say... Take it one day at a time, You've come so far, You lost more than a supermodel in this last year, You are so much more active and healthy... I have said all these things to myself. I am thrilled with my progress, most of the time but sometimes I want to be done with this lifelong fight with Obesity... NOW! Not in another year or two... Right Frickin' Now! I know that I've made a lifestyle change and it doesn't happen overnight but I need to turn up the volume. I need to work harder and cut the fat... literally. When I move next week back home to Philly, I am going to change a couple things... and retweek my routines to see if I can start losing a little faster. And keep on track a little better.... I don't need to be thin, but I want to FIT IN! I don't want to be left out again...

A day in the Life... of a perfectly imperfect Bandster.

2011-04-08T00:06:00.000-07:00

I think my good friend Amy Sunshine(Amy W for you proper name types) had a great idea. While watching Doctor Oz's show the other day I also thought it was misleading when the lapbanders showed what they used to eat and what they now eat... So her idea was to tell all you newbies and those researching the band what a day in our lives look like... I am telling you yesterday since today was a theme park which is not at all typical... I woke up around 9am and had a EAS Carb Control Rich Dark Chocolate Protein shake and a bowl of Fiber One Honey Clusters cereal(1 cup cereal and 1/2 a cup of 1% milk) for breakfast. (325 calories, 26 grams of protein, 16 grams of dietary fiber) Went to the gym and did about 50 minutes of Strength Training and 30 minutes of interval cardio on the recumbent bike. For Lunch I had a 6 pack of Chicken Nuggets from Chick Fila(203 calories, 21 grams of protein, .8g dietary fiber) Snacks-Atkins Daybreak Apple Crisp Bar and a handful of Golden Raisins (195 calories, 11 grams protein, 8 grams dietary fiber), Dinner-Gordon's Grilled Tilapia-Signature Grilled-2 filets with green beans(182 calories, 28g protein, 2g dietary fiber) and after dinner snacks Dannon Greek yogurt- Strawberry fruit on the bottom(120 calories, 12g protein) and Skinny Cow Mint truffle Ice cream Popcicle(100 calories, 3g protein, 3g fiber)... Total calories for the day 1125, protein grams 101, Dietary Fiber Grams 29.8. I am pretty much eating constantly throughout the day but small amounts, mostly good choices. I do other protein shakes sometimes,(Like Atkins Advantage Mocha Latte shake) I also eat Chobani Greek Yogurt sometimes(although I prefer Dannon but they don't have as many flavors), I sometimes mix in some fiber one original Bran cereal in my yogurts if my fiber is too low... I try to get at least 25 grams of fiber a day and at least 95 grams of protein, I try to keep my carbs under 100 grams a day) Most of the items that I ate yesterday are regulars in my routine...

1 vs. 300

2011-04-04T18:15:00.000-07:00

Well, I thought that would be a catchy new name for my blog... 1 vs. 300, since I am up against 300 pesky extra pounds. Now, you might be saying... but you are really only trying to lose 255 pounds to get down to 220. That is my first goal... but my doctor's goal for me is 185 and I figure if I got all the way there, Why now even it out at 175 for an even 300 pounds? And since my hubby weights 193... anything less than that would be awesome.

I have lost 120 pounds as of this morning. Well, I saw it yesterday but I waited to confirm with today's weigh ins.

When I eliminate 6 more of my 300, I will be able to be weighed on a regular scale for the first time in over a decade. I have weighed over 350 for that long.

We get our moving truck in 10 days and will pack up to head home... to Philly.

I missed an awesome girls' weekend in Idaho with my Roomies this past weekend.

I can't wait to hug my nephews and know when I leave them that I can see them tomorrow, or the next day...

Could one of you Northeasterners please get rid of the snow and cold to prepare for my arrival? I planned my move in Mid-April expecting Spring.

I hate moving, packing, sorting, unpacking, and I hope to not have to do it again for a long while.

I love that my MIL watched the Dr. Oz show today to learn more about Gastric Banding so she would understand it better...for me.

Just because I like Coconut Shrimp, doesn't mean I like shrimp.

My husband likes to be naked all the time in the house... and probably outside it too, if I let him.

I can't wait to see you again, or meet you in Chicago... Please come!

I really like peanut butter alot, I may have to detox from that next...

Is it just me or are people's driving getting worse?

I went to Rita's water Ice for a Slenderita fat free Ice Cream... and ended up with Chocolate Peanut butter Italian Ice... I haven't been there for so long, I didn't even know they had that....Have I mentioned my love of Peanut Butter? and you are aware of my love of Chocolate. It wasn't sugar-free but It was small like a dixie cup and it was yummy.

When I saw myself in the mirror at the Gym, I saw a Sleek... lean, athletic machine... It was only a second or two but I think it was a premonition of the future. Or maybe just Delusions of Grandeur.

People who can't/don't eat Pasta or Bread should stay away from Carrabbas... because their bread and pasta are delicious and their bathroom is too small for that amount of crowd the place draws...

People really love Pasta and Bread.... and Carrabbas.

Were you wondering if I had my finger in the Peanut butter right now?

Kirstie Alley is amazing... I wish I could move this Less big body that gracefully. And getting up afraid a humiliating stumble like tonight, Bravo!

I am liking random thought bullets

I want to jump on a trampoline, eventually.

I think Cupcake Wars is making my cupcake obsession worse... and I didn't think that was possible.

I am beginning to think I was born a scrapbooker, otherwise I would have to admit to borderline hoarding.

I like Golden Raisins better than regular ones.

Dannon Greek is delicious, I like it better than Chobani and I just wish they'd come out with more flavors.

My walls look really bare without all my photos and artwork, Is this what it's like to be a Minimalist? It's not for me.

My George designed me a Gym Jams Playlist for my Ipod, and I burned an extra 100 calories today... Coincidence? I think not.

I declare Mondays, Music Monday... I will pick a favorite song each week. I love all kinds of Music, and most of you know I am a huge Gleek, so the song I choose for today is one of my Gym Jams and It's a mashup Mixup of Singing in the Rain and Umbrella from Glee. Check out the video on Utube if you don't watch the show... It's so much fun!

Well, That's enough bull-shits, I mean Bullets for tonight. I would love to hear some random thought comments back... also, If I am not following your blog, please leave your URL in the comments, so I can check out your story...

Hibachi, Junk in the Trunk, Cupcakes, and Chopsticks!

2011-03-31T23:40:00.000-07:00

We went out for dinner to celebrate my one year relationship with my band. They say that the first year of any relationship is the hardest so that would be wonderful since I've lost 118 pounds and I am 118% healthier. Going out to dinner to celebrate should seem a strange way to say cheers to my new way of looking at food but it was wonderful to get together with friends and I love me some Hibachi. Anyway, I got chicken only since I'm trying to eat less red meat and it was yummy. I don't eat the rice but I had a few noodles as you can see... I got me a child's chopstick setup for dramatic effect...LOL. I also ate broccoli, carrots, and a little salad. It was delish and of course I had leftovers. Here I am with my children's chopsticks... they are easier than the regular ones...

If you mock me with my kiddie chopsticks, I'm gonna poke you in the eye.... LOL

Yum, Veggies! and an Onion Volcano... Watch out!

My George got a cupcake since his birthday was earlier this month and we used his birthday coupon, but It's not batting it's eyes and me and tempting me.... I'm gonna punch it! Where's my chopstick numchuks?

Do you know me at all? I love cupcakes. but I only took one bite and let my George have the rest so I could resent him the rest of the night.

Here I am, 1 year old and 118 pounds lighter... I am almost 1/2 way through my journey.

I still got that junk in the trunk... and those thunder thighs but I am getting there. I can't help but notice that the loose skin is starting to make me look pregnant. On to year two!

Stuck Faux Pas!

2011-03-29T21:06:00.000-07:00

Well, We've all been there... In the______(Insert restaurant name here) feeling stuck (ate too fast, couldn't resist the bread, or overeat because it's way yummy)... and making a run for the Bathroom hoping to not toss your cookies before locating it...

Picture it Orlando, 2011. A sexy redhead is out with her equally gorgeous husband George... at a place named after a day of the week actually one people are usually thankful for getting to... She has seen a fancy fish entree on the TV ads... She loves fish post-band... She eagerly orders the parmesan-crab crusted flounder with green beans... and paitently awaits it's arrival. She hasn't eaten much today, very little in fact, and she is starving.

Finally, her fish is caught... and she gazes longingly at it, thinking about where to attack first. Her first bite is delectable, her second devine... her third, non-existant since the first 2 linger bandside... and she sits sulking hoping that it goes down so she can enjoy a few more bites before happily packing the rest up for later....but,

And she's off.... where is it? The bathroom has moved... She can't find it... It has to be here somewhere... and she may not make it... holding her breath, there it is, she power walks in and looks to the right a trash can awaits... and she turns to the left.... and a man is using the urinal...OMG! Is he in the wrong bathroom? She backs out quietly to make sure it's his mistake and it's not... She doesn't feel as stuck now, since the humiliation which would usually cause a lump in her throat has caused the opposite effect in her case. She races across the hall to the other room after finding the stick figure in the frock.

Long story short... She keeps the fish in, and waits til the red dies down in her face, wondering whether her George should hear the tale of embarrassment curing the Stuck. Knowing that even if she didn't tell him... She would definitely tell you.

I actually enjoy my workouts... What up?

2011-03-27T12:22:00.000-07:00

Here I am with my trainer, Justin... He's a cutie and so understanding of my physical limitations. He knows how to push me just right. I workout at the YMCA, as you can see. I didn't want my George to get other people accidentally in the background, since folks don't usually like to be "Seen" working out at the Gym, all sweaty and such.

Lateral Pull, one of the 4 machines I do for my strength training...It's not so bad.

The Leg Press, which is my favorite... since all this weight I am carrying around has given me the strongest legs in the world, well, maybe not the strongest, but the strongest of my limbs...LOL

The Upright Row, on a boat going to nowhere... and I'm getting a little annoyed at George asking me to smile for the photos at this point... Working out is no laughing matter...LOL

The Chest Press, The most evil of the machines... It is my hardest... I guess my chest is the least muscular... well, chest, shoulders, back arms... and whatever else this psycho works out... My husband loves my flabby chest though...LOL

This is one of the Elliptical machines, easily to walk into for those of us who have a farther walk to fitness. It is a much harder workout than my recumbent bikes so I mix the Two... I unfortunately don't have a photo of myself on the recumbent bike since my hubby couldn't stay but I would have been a sweated mess anyway, since the Elliptical wears me out.

Leaving my Gym and my Trainer is hard, but I have been looking into a Gym near my new home. I really enjoy the YMCA because the people there aren't there for a meat market... They are there to workout, and it's a family place with people of all ages and fitness levels. Some of them are nicer than others... The one I go to is like a Country Club Y... LOL. Anyway, It is difficult to get started and to get re-started but once you keep going 4 or 5 times a week is easier than I ever thought and when I don't go... I Wii Just Dance or do my Zumba DVDs... So, I can keep this weight loss going in the right direction.

As for eating, I have been off Chocolate for over a week and staying strong. It can be hard to resist at times but I've had no real cravings so far... which eating it causes me... So that's good. I love Bagels and really have missed them since eating them is Stuck City. I found that Rold Gold has Everything Bagel pretzels and I love pretzels and love Bagels... so the combo was hard to resist. I got them and they're delicious. They are about the size of a quarter and round with a hole in the middle like a bagel. 14 of them are in a serving for 120 calories and 22 carbs(higher than I like, but... once in a while) 2 are dietary fiber(Always good). I separate them into servings using ziploc bags, which keeps me from overeating. I have been doing that with everything including my fiber one cereal. It's easy to do when I buy it and way convienent in a time crunch. I love to grab and go...

I have been loving "Hungry Girl" Lisa Lillen's new show on the Cooking Channel... She's fabulous and her ideas are easy to incorporate into our diets. She suggest making our own trail mixes which she does with popcorn, Fiber one cereal, chocolate covered soybeans, and nuts. You don't have a full serving of any one item at a time... and mix it up. She bags them into baggies for grab and go... I might try it with my new Bagel pretzels... who knows!

I have been taking a 1/4 or a 1/2 serving of the original fiber one bran cereal and mixing it into my Greek Yogurt and it's giving it a great extra texture and some crunch and a nice fiber boost. Instead of Granola which is not usually high-fiber and is usually high-sugar... Keep mixing it up to see what works for you...

One year into my Journey...

2011-03-23T15:09:00.000-07:00

When I see these photos now, I think... Thank Goodness for cropping.

Our 10 year wedding anniversay trip to Disney's Vero Beach Resort... Baby Got Back! Mickey's Backyard BBQ... Baby Got Front!

Right after we bought our first house... April of 2005, the date is wrong on the photo.

The Day before surgery... Pre-op Visit. I think the biggest difference is that I am no longer ROUND... I have an hourglass(More like a Weekglass) figure back after like 7 years or so... That was the last time I was the size I am now... but the best is yet to come!

and...

I am loving my Gym life... I go to the gym 4 or 5 days a week. I do my strength training 3 days a week and on those days I also do Cardio Interval training, and on the days I don't do my strength training I just do cardio. I am more active, everyday.

and...

I love alot of healthy foods, I love grilled fish, especially Tilapia or Mahi Mahi, Greek Yogurt, Grilled Chicken, Broccoli, Green Beans, Baby Spinach, Butternut Squash, and I am trying new things to add to my favorites everyday.

and...

I hardly ever feel depressed(Exercise helps with the chemical imbalances that cause clinical depression)... although i do sometimes feel frustrated or overwhelmed. I feel powerful, like I am in control for the first time in my life. I feel knowledgeable, and able to make informed food choices... and more than a few uninformed ones too.

and...

*****I feel beautiful, I lost that somewhere in the last 100 pounds I gained or so... I smile all the time, I enjoy life with less limits, I dream again( The fat dried up my dreams pretty good too), I love well and often(I don't wonder why my husband is so madly in love with me or how he could possibly be attracted to me, and for a while there... It was hard not to wonder)...

and...of course,

*******I'm going home to where fat began, to where I was formed, molded, and raised... To where my family resides and thrives... To where Cheese is a condiment and butter is a staple... To where Soft Pretzels live( I love soft pretzels!), To the City of Brotherly Love... and My sweet Nephews who My Loving Brother blessed us with... This is a place where dessert is a course... and people eat it first to make sure they have room... And Where I am going to become my inner Supermodel! You will see, Stay Tuned!

One month ago on our cruise... Formal night, I love this dress and when I got it, It was too small. So I tried it for our last cruise in October and it was still a little too tight, I wasn't even gonna try it this time since I haven't lost alot since last October but It is loose now and hangs a little like a bag on me. Not very flattering to my new hourglass figure.... but at least I got to wear it once.

This is one month ago on my cruise...

This was a week ago... at EPCOT... I can see alot of differences from my befores, and alot of loose skins and lumps... LOL

I see you... Yes, You! Your comments lift my spirits, your friendship lifts my heart, and your support... Lifts my Weights! I am stronger with you in my corner! And thinner.... LOL

My Hat's off to you all! Thanx for your support... I am so glad that you are all part of my Healthier, Happier Life!

PS... I am giving up on the paragraphs thing, I am obviously not tech suavy... and I ramble in real-life too, as alot of you already know. I am trying to make paragraphs, and it seems to work sometimes... and then other times, not so much.

Today...One year ago...

2011-03-22T17:54:00.000-07:00

This photo was taken at my surgeon's office one year ago, today. It was after the pre-op diet where I lost 15.6 pounds and so I weighed 452 pounds. My highest weight was 475 pounds the previous November at my Seminar... which means I only lost 7 pounds in the 5 months before the pre-op diet. The same amount I lost in 1 week on the liquid diet. I struggled to lose weight all through out my life unless I suffered and deprived myself on a strict diet. Well, It hasn't been easy this last year... I have worked for every pound lost of the 116 pounds but I kept with it, hardly ever felt deprived(Even after giving up chocolate 4 days ago), and most importantly... Maintained my weight loss when I screwed up or binged out. I am not on a diet, I feel normal for the first time in my life. I don't have to feel guilty if I have a cookie or cupcake... because this is a lifestyle and "Normal" people eat cake once in a while. I could have dieted and exercised like a maniac... and I would have lost more weight... and my road is long ahead. But I am on the right road, for the first time in my life. And I am never alone on that road... You are all with me, some of you have walked already when I have been and some are walking with me, and some will follow me along this road but we have each other and are "Banded" for life. I will post some during photos tomorrow on my actually Bandiversary.

Detox... Day 2- The Ghiradelli Dilemma

2011-03-20T21:45:00.000-07:00

Well, I made it through Day 2 and I am feeling pretty great. My Aunt and family were visiting Universal Studios this weekend and we met up with them today before they flew home tonight. My Aunt Donna is a little over 4 years older than me and we are more like sisters so i was thrilled to get to see her.

We went to Downtown Disney and had lunch at Earl of Sandwich( I had 1/2 of a yummy Chinese Chinese Salad, Yay! for leftovers)... Then we went to Ghiradelli's for ice cream. I didn't want them to feel bad about my chocolate detox... so I went along and had a scoop of sugar free butter pecan ice cream(Also Yummy) and wasn't tortured by them all eating the most delicious decadent chocolate gooey stuff.

Anyway, I beat my Super Villain today.... I beat the CHOCOLATIER! The war is far from over but today's battle was mine!

Chocolate Detox... Day 1

2011-03-19T19:01:00.000-07:00

It was easy all day but I have cravings tonight, which is strange since I ate very little carbs today because I didn't want cravings....and I didn't eat chocolate every day before this. Well, I drank one of my protein shakes which is Rich Dark Chocolate flavor and it seems to have curbed my cravings with no sugar and very little carbs. Yay! I hope to get to the point when I don't miss it, but it is not likely. I have a friend who gave up chocolate like 9 years ago and still would like to have it, even now. We'll see what tomorrow brings, I probably should have chose a day that i don't go to the gym to start my detox, since working out makes me crave carbs. But hindsight is always 20/20...

I was thinking alot about rewards... Rewards were always food based before my surgery. Eating in my favorite restaurant, ice cream, and of course expensive chocolates. So since that wouldn't be a healthy way to go, these days. I haven't been able to reward myself for my weight loss so far... I thought about a pandora bracelet that I could add charm beads to for each of the milestones I hit, i thought about trips(Since I love to travel), designer purses, a new wardrobe... The verdict. I have everything I want, and if I don't have it... I get it. So the only way to reward myself is to first deprive myself... Which usually causes problems.

I should tell you I have an addictive personality, which means food is not my only obsession... Shopping, is a close second. Since I never fit in anything worth obsessing over... Clothes wasn't where it was at for me. But I have a ton of purses, hats, and shoes... waiting for the perfect outfit that never came in my size. I actually have bought alot of clothes over the years that I intended to shrink into... and now, I've shrunk out of them. Yay! for me!

Back to the problem at hand, without rewards and goals... I don't have anything to shoot for... a deadline if you will. But for me... It has to be big, and something to save for too. So, I hate my teeth. They're yellow from having fevers or something as a child...They're so friggin' small, they make my gums look huge like Molly Ringwald's, and they're weak so they're chipped. I want new crowns, bigger and whiter. I am not sure how much this will cost but I am going to find out once we move. I love to smile, and I have such a nice smile, so shouldn't I have nice teeth. I am going to research how much this would all cost and maybe spread it out to several rewards.

Well, I never really mention goals much, because my journey began because my weight had caused many health problems... all of which are cured. So I guess It's time for more goals, My 25 year High School reunion will be in the fall of 2012. So that it the date I will set to be at my goal weight. I don't want to set a date too soon since i have so much left to lose. So If I get there before then... great! And I may rethink my goals... along the way.

My Super Villain... Frienemy!

2011-03-18T18:29:00.000-07:00

I am sure those of you who know me... know who the Super Villain to my Wonder Woman is... The Chocolatier! The original Frienemy... I have a love/hate relationship with Chocolate, since as long as I can remember... even before I was Pleasantly Plumpin' up! I have been giving it alot of thought for several days now, and I have experienced all levels of this addiction... So, Why can't I give up the drug? I know that food addiction is the worst addiction since you can't go COLD turkey on food... but I could give up Chocolate, physically... but emotionally, not so much. I can't get my head around it! I know it causes me stalls in weight loss, weight gain, binges, cravings, and obsessions that I want to leave behind me... The result of all this thought... IF I CAN GIVE UP CHOCOLATE, I CAN BEAT THE WHOLE THING!

***Will I have to give up my favorite protein shakes because they are chocolate flavored? I hope not, It took me a long time to find protein shakes that were low carb and didn't taste like HELL! Well, at first I will only give up Chocolate that melts... Like Candy Bars, regular or sugar free.

****If the cravings don't stop, I will have to give up my sugar free dark chocolate pudding... and I hope it doesn't come to that. I will only eat them if I want chocolate... and need to fill the void. I am probably going to ween myself off them too, but baby steps, People!

****I am hoping that I will enjoy the chocolate flavor of the protein shakes enough to squash the need for other chocolate replacement items.

****I realize how silly I sound but this is my Kryptonite... and I need to get to a better place with food. I am not at this happy green place that I read about in other blogs and I blame myself. Eating is still more important to me than It should be. I don't want to eat alot of the time, not because of not being hungry but because I want to eat things that aren't good choices for me... If I curb the cravings, I will kill the beast.

****You may ask, Why Maria? Why would you wait til you are almost banded a year to make this change? Well, Let me be honest, I was hoping to be one of these bandsters who eat one square of chocolate and savor it, and walk away satisfied... I am not one of these lucky bitches, no offense to those of you who are.... I wish I was one of the COOL kids who can do Chocolate and not have it be a "Gateway Drug"... like it is to me. You know who you are.... I used to think Ice cream was my kryptonite, but I can eat a little and walk away satisfied... Now who's the lucky bitch? I hardly even have ice cream anymore... or cookies, chips, etc. Chocolate made me it's bitch years ago, and now I need to fight back.

****Think of this like an intervention that i am having over blogland... This post is mostly me thinking out loud. I know you will support me in the hardest fight of my life.... This is the overly dramatic part of the intervention. I may get to a place where I can eat a piece of chocolate and smile satisfied, but that is not today... and tomorrow is unlikely too.

**** I have beaten many villains in my journey... Fried Foods, Ice cream, chips, popcorn, most candy, doughnuts, red meat, bread, pasta, rice, potatoes, most sauces and gravies, baked goods(Even cupcakes), and __________. Someday, I will fill Chocolate is that last blank, the rest of those Items I eat rarely, but they don't eat me. I own them... but they don't own me. Chocolate owns me. It really does! I am a self-admitted drama queen but I ain't lying!

Night hungers... are coming to get me!

2011-03-13T21:32:00.000-07:00

There's one thing... well, probably more than one, since my Band installation last year, that hasn't FIXED itself yet and I need your advice. I eat well all day, and once we get into night hours, the wanting takes over... I want to eat. I am not sure what but I want to eat. I don't feel like eating most of the day and have to "force" myself to get my protein in and have the energy to workout and keep off my A$$. I need to keep my body moving... since the more I move, the better I feel.

Here are the things I've tried to do to keep from nighthungers...

1)Cut my carbs down... I love chocolate(I eat sugar-free) and other sweets but I cut down my carbs without being willing to cut out chocolate completely. I don't eat white foods: Rice, Bread, and pasta... and hardly any potatoes, although for some reason after my banding I crave mashed potatoes even though I've never liked them. I have added some carbs when i added fiber to my diet but not too many. When I read Jen(It's is all about me!) mentioned that her doctor just told her to eat no more than 30 carbs a day and at least 60 grams of protein, I was shocked. I have been eating like 50 carbs a day to 100 on a bad day... so I am cutting out my protein bars, greek yogurt, and cutting down as much as I can. So, how do you get enough fiber in your diet while keeping your carbs low? How much benefiber do you take each day?

2)I also try to fill up on low calorie/low carb snacks... like pickles, mostly pickles... that's what my doctor tells me to eat for a snack if I'm hungry between meals. I asked him if fried pickles were alright, but he didn't see the humor in that.

3)Keeping busy... I tried working out again at night, reading, packing and going through stuff, and going to bed early... even sex, to distract me from the night hungers... In the Geneen Roth books on Complusive eating, she says that when you want to eat when you're not hungry, it means you're really hungry for something else.

4)I've tried doing the mind exercises in Geneen Roth's books, basically to figure out what will fill the void... instead of food, It hasn't worked so far, but it has helped.

So what do you think I should try to get out of this rut... and jumpstart my weight loss. I expected it to slow or even stop with strength training but I didn't expect the hunger to get so much worse.

Another day, Another Dollop!

2011-03-12T09:27:00.000-08:00

I think that our new motto should be "Another day, Another Dollop", since our a little of this and a little of that, has become the new normal. I was so proud of myself yesterday, because I went to a buffet and didn't feel like "I have to get my money's worth!!" It is only $6.49 at the Golden Corral, because I pay the senior price because of my lapband... so "Money's Worth" is silly. I had a little spoonful of this and a little forkful of that... ate off a small plate, and ate protein first, and the Icing on the cake... I got a chocolate cupcake and stared at it throughout the meal... and took 2 small bites of it and left the rest... Ok, Ladies and Gentlemen, You know how I love cupcakes... my husband calls me "Cupcake" because of my love for them... I even love the show Cupcake Wars on the Food Network. But I took 2 baby bites! And didn't beat myself up for wasting it! And I felt great when I left, not stuffed and bloated. i love that they have the nutritional information on the buffet so I can make informed decisions about what to eat too. I had a small piece of broiled fish, broccoli, a small dollop of mashed potatoes(I never liked them but started craving them after my band install, weird?), a hushpuppy(Just 1, Don't hate me because I love fried food, fried is 1 letter away from friend, I really wanted another but i didn't go back), a spoonful of tuna salad, and 2 bites of a cupcake... Definitely more than I normally eat at a meal, but not a ton. I almost skipped out of the restaurant... feeling victorious for the day!

The Redheaded StepChild... in the 12 step program.

2011-03-10T21:25:00.000-08:00

Me with my sweet nephew Blake... The story starts with him, and ends with him since I can't seem to move this photo to the bottom(See previous post about my lack of technical skills)

"Once in his life, every man is entiltled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead"-Lucille Ball"While the rest of the species is descended from apes, redheads are descended from cats." Mark Twain
Me in Grade School, about 9 or 10, I was mature looking for my age... wasn't I ?

Hey, Well... i have sorta dropped the ball with blogging everyday, i know I have things to say but I can't seem to get my thoughts in order... but here goes. I was thinking I would tell you about a driving force in my life... My hair. Now, know this... I am not a hair bear, it is just got out of bed, bedhead messy mostly but it is RED and my eyes are brown, incredibly rare combo... Now, I know a few of you are redheads too, but most of you are not and that's because it is quite rare still, even though many people are "dying" to be a redhead. Pun intended... I didn't always cherish my hair, as a child I was teased viciously because of it. I even asked my Mom to dye it many times so I could be "Like everyone else" By the time I was in Junior High/Middle School, the same boys who had teased me were taken in by my "Charm"... So now, I consider my red hair a lucky charm of sorts.

Me, after embracing my Hair color...

Let us look at the stereotypes... Fiery temper(Sometimes Check), Sexpot/sexy/overly sexual/oversexed(Sorta check and I wishand everything in between), Fiesty Personality(Double check), Adventureous(Definite Check), Ugly(Not a chance check), Snobby(Never in my life check), prone to sunburn(Ouch Check), Irish(A little Check, mostly German), Trouble(Usually check), Fire Crotch(Yep, Tru dat check), Charlie Brown loves the little Redheaded Girl(Damn right, check)...

Well, because of the teasing, i found strength in red-haired characters growing up like Pippi Longstocking, Strawberry Shortcake, Nancy Drew, Daphne from Scooby Doo, Jane Jetson and Wilma Flintstone(Pretty strongwilled wives), Anne of Green Gables, and the list goes on... as time went on I added Jessica Rabbit and Ariel, the little mermaid to that list and more recently Jesse from Toy Story, but anyone/anything with reddish hair would do for my young mind... including Garfield, and Oliver from Oliver and Company... In my subconcious mind, I thought if redheads were so ugly, why would so many people chose to make their characters redheaded... there were more redheaded character than they were actual redheads... LOL, I am happy that the young redheads now have Kim Possible, Ginger from the series as told by Ginger, Madeline, Darby from my friends Tigger and Pooh, and many many others... My favorite was always Pippi... who was strong and no one teased her and everyone wanted to be her friend... even though she had bright red hair in braids that stuck straight out from the sides of her head.

The reason I mention my redhead bliss... Is that I found that redheaded child again several times recently... Julianne Moore(Actress) has a wonderful book series called Freckleface Strawberry which teases redheads to love their hair and even find being different wonderful... and I wished that it was around when I was growing up. But the biggest reason is my youngest nephew Blake is obviously a redhead... and his parents(My brother and his wife) aren't very happy about it, because my brother saw how I was teased and doesn't want his son to face the same and my SIL is a Guidance Counseler whose seen the redheaded children who are teased and tried to console them. Well, for a while, Blake will be 1 in May, they kept saying he has strawberry blonde hair, but when I saw it... I knew it was the same as mine. My hair was dark strawberry blonde as a child and it's darkened over the years... but it was more strawberry than blond, if you know what I mean. The other day, my brother finally admitted to my Mom... "Blake has Maria's hair" and sorrow filled his voice. I understand not wanting your child to suffer, I wouldn't wish the teasing on any child but Kids are cruel and if they don't tease you for having red-hair, then they'll find something else. Blake is a beautiful child, with a sweet temperment and a smile that light up the room... He will win over his critics, like I did. I know he will... I would be more worried about him getting our metabolism(Instead of his Mom's), since FAT has been much more of a burden, for much more of my life than having red-hair. i guess I should just be glad that the FAT came during my teenage years, or I would have been the FAT Red-haired Kid... Double Whammy!

Run-on sentences and personal training...

2011-03-08T21:01:00.000-08:00

Forgive me Followers... for I am Dumb. Catherine mentioned something that has always bothered me, My blogging, as you can see... Is one big run-on sentence... because I don't know how to fix it... I try to write in paragraphs but it always ends up looking like one big paragraph. So, I need a crash course... I need to admit that I may be a wordsmith in speech but in the written word.... not so much. Luckily, Speech doesn't always show grammar and such.... And I talk so fast that the run-on sentences aren't as obvious in speech. Anyway, How do you all make your blogs look so clean and neat and easy to read? Do you write them on here or in Microsoft Word or whatever and transfer them to here by copy and paste or whatever? BTW, I had my first session with my Personal Trainer today, Justin, and he's so sweet and young and pocket sized but pretty muscular. I love the big YMCA near me... All the personal training is computerized, so when i enter my code, the machine tells me the settings for the chair, back, etc and it tells me what weight I have been working with... which I can raise when I am ready. I feel a little sore, but not so bad. I am going to do the strength training 3 times a week... basically every other day and the cardio i will do more often. I am not getting my hopes up but I am still trying to seperate this mess into paragraphs... and it may be working, if it reads like one long sentence... i spoke too soon. Well, my eating has been pretty good but not perfect. When I workout... i am more hungry, more often. My carbs are a little higher than they used to be since I am eating 25-30 grams of dietary fiber a day too. I did treat myself to some yummy Yoplait Dessert yogurts... they are like 100 calories each and taste like a dessert. I love the Thick and Creamy Lemon Meringue creme one best... It's a nice low calorie treat. Bear in mind, The dessert yogurt are a treat with only 5 or 6 grams of protein... unlike my Greek Yogurt which is a meal, but still yummy.

Remembering my Dad on his birthday!

2011-03-08T14:32:00.000-08:00

Here I am with my Daddy at my first Christmas 1969... I was already a Daddy's Girl.

My first Christmas with my Mom and Dad... I was an only child for a little while... LOL

The Day in 1976 when my Dad became a US Citizen... I was 7 years old.

My Dad joking with me while doing the yard work... and yes, that's my sexy George in the background without his shirt... LOL. I think it was 2000 or 2001

My Dad loved his beer, I know it's a shocking trait for a German... Huh?

I'm keeping up with this bandiversary month at least one post a day... So far. Well, today would have been my Dad's 73rd birthday but we lost him to Pancreatic Cancer 8 years ago... He was an amazing man, He was born in Romania as a German citizen... He and his family were chased from their home there by the Russians at the very start of World War 2. They were forced to leave almost everything behind and what valuables they had left were taken from them on the road when they were attacked and robbed by a band of gypsies. My Dad's Mom, my MomMom had the earrings ripped from her earlobs and the snake tongue looking tears remained as a daily reminder of what they had gone through... When they got to Germany, the war got worse and they took my PopPop to a Work Camp and my MomMom and the kids to a Displaced person camp... Even though they were German citizens, being born in another country and living there made them displaced. They lived in a one room shack with 3 other families and used sheets as walls for privacy. My Aunts were taken to join the Hitler youth, since they didn't believe what Hitler had been saying and did not want to leave their family, while on the train, My Aunt Anne faked an attack of appendicitis, she bent over in pain wailing until the took her to hospital and removed her Appendix, luckily you don't have to have it to live... Her sister Ella was alowed to stay with her and they went back to their family to recooperate. My father was the man of the house as a little boy and would do anything to keep his family fed... he worked on a bread truck for the day to get them a loaf of bread, collected scrap and old weapons to sell, worked the milk truck to get a jug of milk, etc. He was 5 or 6... at the time. When the war was over, they were still together but didn't know where my PopPop was... since he was forced to go to the work camp. My Aunt Anne was dating a US Army Soldier and he helped to find him, dying of tuberculosis in a hospital... He pulled through and they tried to rebuild the lives that were taken from them when the war began. My Dad toured all over Europe on his motorcycle, it might be where my travel bug came from... When he was 18, he was riding his motorcycle home late one night and was hit and run... left to die, the motorcycle landed on top of him... He was luckily found by the milkman making deliveries... but he was in a coma for several weeks and in the hospital for 2 months... One of his legs was shorter than the other and he walked with a slight limp and a pin in his hip for the rest of his life... One thing I thought was incredibly interesting was the steel factory where he worked paid him his full salary for the whole 6 months that he was recooperating. Amazing, huh? I am thinking that I might be interested in all these stories since he was my Daddy... and you may not since he wasn't yours.... but hey, it's my blog and I can bore if I want to... Well, In 1959, my Dad and his family emigrated to the US, Philadelphia, PA, he met my Mom 5 years later and I was born 10 years later. So I am a first generation American... My Dad became a US citizen in 1976, fitting, huh? I remember how proud he was and the photo of him next to the Liberty bell that he took that day. I know that I am sad to have lost him so young and so fast but... I was so blessed to have him as a Father at all. And I miss him everyday. BTW, these stories were told to me in a mix of Germish... My MomMom told me and my brother and sister so we could know what type of man, my father was... since he would never blow his own horn...LOL Anyway, Happy Birthday Dad! I miss you much, but Love you more.

Inspiring? Adventureous? ME?

2011-03-07T15:21:00.000-08:00

Since this month is my one year mark since my basnd installation date... March 23rd, to be exact. I wanted to mention some strange changes since one year ago. I have been a weight loss expert for years... I know how to lose weight but since I haven't been totally successful at getting it all off and keeping it off, no one acknowledged my skill level... Well, now people ask me for tips and take me seriously when i give advice on how to regain their health... Because even though I haven't lost all my excess weight, and may never... lose it all, I have turned my health sompletely around and take an active effort in keeping myself healthy and active. In other words, the student has become the teacher... not that I don't have more to learn, we never run out of things to learn, but I know what works for me... and what doesn't. One of you amazing women, actually called me Adventureous! That word could always describe my spirit but I dreamed of the day when I could take on adventures like my spirit took flight and I am getting there, one day at a time. I feel like I am a changed person... and losing weight has never made me feel that way before. I may not always make good food choices, who does? but I do most of the time... and It feels great to be fueling my body and soul with my choices... and i feel like cha cha poo poo... when i carb out! I have been called inspirational! Me? i would understnad someone who is at goal and working at keeping it off while curing cancer and feeding the homeless but me? Inspirational is the best thing I could ask to be... I see people struggling with their weight and food choices, and I want to help... I want to Inspire others as you have all inspired me, I want to be a little Ray of Sunshine like Amy, A brilliant charitible mind like Grace, A true life Sex in the City character like Catherine, A Sweet Survivor like Kim and Amey, A Strong thoughtful Superwoman like Barb, A stiletto wearing sexpot like Stephanie, A incredibly poetic mind like Draz, A charismatic Cutie like Carmie, A sexy Supermodel like Kristen, A Marathon runner like Jen, Ms. M, and so many other of you... You all inspire me to be the best me that i can be! And I can only hope that I do the same for all of you!

Ruby's back!

2011-03-06T12:34:00.000-08:00

Well, tonight is the season premiere for RUBY... and she's gained back 60 pounds(I didn't see that coming, She says sarcastically while rolling her eyes wildly)... I didn't always watch the show, I found her character annoying and whiney but I started watching again, after finding my own character whiney and annoying too... Well, I see all the addictive behaviors that I struggle with myself... so It is easy for me to relate to her, but I wish she would realize that it is ok to admit we need help sometimes... and I am happy that I got help for my addictions. There's no cure for the addiction only periods of remission. I will watch the show mostly because gaining back is my biggest fear. When I plateau like right now... I am most afraid, since it is one step from a regain. If I see the scale hop up for a day or two, I freak out, but eating right gets it to come right back down... and losing would be much better than not gaining. **************************************************************************************PS>>> The show is a reality show on the Style network, It is a true story of a Ruby Gettiger, a morbidly obese woman's struggle to lose weight... She weighed like 716 pounds when she started to try to lose weight. She has lost hundreds of pounds with diet and exercise...

Biggest Loser? Or just a Regular Loser?

2011-03-05T20:42:00.000-08:00

Well, I am sure I've mentioned to you that I don't watch the Biggest Loser but I guess I should give it a try since I now love the show "Heavy"... and many of you watch the show every week loyally. Today, Here in Orlando, at Universal Citywalk... there were open auditions for the 12th season of the show "The Biggest Loser"... I can't get an exact number of people that showed up but the lines that they showed on the news looked like thousands... I know they claimed that they would see the first 500 people at least who need to lose at least 100 pounds. My friend, Wendy, was #391... I am not sure what happened with her interview yet although I was keeping up with her progress in line on facebook earlier. The reason that I do not agree with the show is that anyone can lose weight with no distractions or daily routine holding them back... Jobs, Stress, kids, school, marriage and other serious relationships... are a part of most of our lives. If we could all go to a "Fat" Camp for adults where we work out all day long and only take breaks to eat 2 ounces of grilled chicken and a lettuce leaf...otherwise known as the Chicken and Lettuce Bitch diet. We would be annoyed, cranky, sore, and miserable but we would be thinner. Then you are sent back to your regular stress filled life... with dancing sugarplums filling your head and about 10-30 minutes a day and less than $10 a day to make healthy meals... and stay away from carbs. Since there's no extra time for exercise... We try dancing around during other activities... like showering and slip on the soap... or try to hula hoop while doing the laundry. I think you get the extremely sarcastic point. And obviously I exaggerated for dramatic effect... What else is new? Well, i have rambled long enough... but Wendy(My Loser Friend... still hoping to be the biggest one) has said on many occasions to me... "I want to lose weight the natural way" or "I want to lose weight the right way"... I'm sure she didn't mean to cut down the way I chose to lose weight... but the tone was questionable... To make a long story more long... Now, the Girl who wants to lose weight naturally or the right way... would like to be whipped into shape on TV in front of millions of Lookey Loos... chewing on her lettuce and chicken... What's so natural about that? Losing weight, my way, her way, or the biggest loser's way... is all good... There is no right or wrong way, just your way. Anyway, Go get it Wendy! You would spice up that show, for sure!

My George's Birthday...

2011-03-04T20:47:00.001-08:00

GeoTagged, [N28.36979, E81.51908]

Well, Happy Birthday to my George.... He's 43 years old today and since I stopped aging years ago, my old man seems like a cradle robber these days... We went on that cruise to celebrate his birthday so today was really downplayed... Just a nice dinner at his favorite steakhouse and the movies... Gotta love the simple things in life! It is a day of great celebration for me since this is the anniversary of the day God gave the Earth My Prince.... And I look forward to celebrating many more birthdays together and with our families soon! Happy Birthday to my other half!!! I love you so much, I think my heart will burst!

When did FAT begin?....

2011-03-03T21:02:00.000-08:00

Looking back at my history of self esteem... here I am at about 18... I look like I am so happy and full of confidence... I was beautiful. I know I still am beautiful... but somewhere along the way, I stopped trying.Here I am on my honeymoon... I was 26 years old and totally in love with my husband... which is why i allowed him to take this photo of me in a bathing suit... in our private pool... There are hardly any photos of me other than close ups taken after 1991... I was in deep FAT awareness from then on... but for George... anything. Of course, I never expected anyone else to see this photo... and now, I would kill to look so good in a swimsuit.
In 1982, Our family took our first trip to DisneyWorld... and here i am in shorts... Only complete and total giddyness in the Happiest Place on Earth, would inable the allowance of my legs in full view... Those were some great Gams... but I didn't see it, at the time. All I saw was thunder thighs...

Does this naked little girl in the tub with her sister look like she's worried about Cellulite? Not yet, 1972, I was 3 years old... and blissfully naked.How about a bikini shot? Does this sweet little girl with her sister bathing in the summer sun seem concerned about stretch marks? It was 1974 and I was about 5

Here I was at 12... and i know I already thought I was fat... but I was gorgeous... and I can't believe that i wouldn't cherish my amazing curves...

Now, at 16... I was overly curvy... on my way to FATtown but not there yet... Of course, I thought I was huge... And I would kill for that body today.

Here I am at 20, 2 years before I met my George... and i couldn't put enough clothes on to cover my immense frame... Do you see where this is going?

I think sometime after or during puberty... when all my curves were coming into play... And the FAT... creeped into my mind first and then onto my ass... I wished I wasn't so worried about being or getting Fat long enough to just enjoy my teenage melodrama... You only get to once usually... unless you are cast on 90210 or something. I am trying to look at these photos with a fresh eye... and learn to like what I see.

This one time at BAND Camp... 1 vs. 300

I Hate TOM....

Linda asked me What I like about... ME!

Greek BJs....

Stuck.... a Journey into Madness.

BYOC.... Better late than pregnant

Friend Hoarder?... Get rid of the dead weight, all of it!

I love Movies.... and I realize I don't share enough about it.

Just a Shot in the Dark, and the days that follow.

Winter?... Wanderland.

Movies and Stuff....

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia... Yeah Right!

Detox... Day one.

ReNew... My Word for 2012

Christmas comes in like a Bullet!

The road to recovery has alot of scenic routes and forks...

Worldwind Week....

BOOBS' Blessings brought home from Chicago

Coming Home.... Just in time for a Big Fat Turkey and Hopefully some PIE!

Roller Coasters.... A Fat Girl's Enemy?

The Sunshine State,,, Bullets over Disney

Headed to find the Sun....

Life gets in the Way....

*****My Friend Beth... The Blogging Bandster.******

Sweet Sixteen-Always Been Kissed!

Do you like Key Lime Pie?

KEY LIME

Recuperation... My Kind of Town?

I'm so excited, And I just can't hide it....

The Facts of Life.... DiZneDiva Style!

Does anyone have a winter coat for me?

Big Sexy!

Food... A Love-Hate Relationship.

New Product... Flatout's Fold-its. Yum!

BOOBS Survey... My Life's an Open Book!

Worst Week... Reality, It's not just for TV.

You are the Wind beneath my batwings!

Pity Party... Table for ONE.

BYOC... I have been busy but I keep missing them each week... Here it is.

A Whirlwind Week.... In a Long-Winded Nutshell!

Fill 'er up! And see the Sights!

20 questions... and answers?

What a Week! or should I say "What a Weak!"

Weekly Whine... and a little cheese too.

CyberBully....

Midnight Confessional....

WTF.... A Life in Bullet form.

Goodbye Plateau?

How's Life in The FAT Lane?

Happy Independance Day from where It all began!

Birthday Blues... and Me.

BOOBS alert... I need a room or a couch for Sunday night?

Just a bunch of stuff and things...

I wonder.... Random things.

Be Careful what you wish for... You might get it!

Enema... A Love Story.(Graphic for Draz...LOL)

Mean Girls.... and Me.

The Road thru CandyLand in a Sticky one...

I can't keep my mouth shut... oh wait!

Totally Random Thursday....well, Friday?

Philly is supposed to be home to Soul, not the Blues.

To the Lady at Giant....

I'm getting old.... but my skin is flawless!

Scale Calibration.... and other Excuses.

Banded Bullets.... and other crapola.

Happy Keaster to You!

Easter comes but once a year... Thank Goodness!

Bullets over Philly!

I am alive and well... well, sort of!

Moving... A trial of Hell on Earth.

Eating out... DiZneDiVa style!

FAT is a state of mind... and apparently the state of my behind.

A day in the Life... of a perfectly imperfect Bandster.

1 vs. 300

Hibachi, Junk in the Trunk, Cupcakes, and Chopsticks!

Stuck Faux Pas!

I actually enjoy my workouts... What up?

One year into my Journey...

Today...One year ago...

Detox... Day 2- The Ghiradelli Dilemma

*My Friend Beth... The Blogging Bandster.**